Son been offered magnetic baha aid but he doesn't want the surgery

[Purplerainpurplesky]

My son has been profoundly deaf in his left ear since birth. We have used a baha aid at school since reception and this helps him massively.

At age 7, he is finally a candidate for an implanted hearing aid but he doesn't want it. He keeps saying no every time we talk about it.

It would really benefit him in over his lifetime but I also don't want to traumatize him when he's so against it but at the end of the day he is only 7.

At what age would you take your child's views on medical surgeries etc, he doesn't understand the long term benefits but I also don't want to force him to have life changing surgery.

Any advice would be great.

Teacher of the Deaf here. I think it would be good to find someone else who has had the same procedure and introduce them. You could ask your ToD to put you in touch with someone. That way he could find out more about what is involved.

Does he have to have it now?

No he doesn't, which is why we have said we will take some time to think over the options. My concerns are he really struggles with reading and concentrating in class, his behaviour, loudness and hearing all dramatically improve when he wears the aid on a soft band (headband).

He doesn't have a teacher of the deaf. He has good hearing on his right but profound sensinuereal deafness on his left side, we never seen one since he was 2.5years.

I don't think I'd make the decision for him at that age.
Keep him aware that it's an option, and if possible see if there's anyone you can meet who has one (ask around friends, someone may have a collegue or relative who does) where they can show him and talk about the benefits, but I definitely wouldn't force it if he's scared of the idea at this age which is very understandable.

Can he articulate why he doesn't want it? Is he worried about the operation itself or just doesn't see the need, or something else?

He would have a ToD if he was in our area. Could be worth contacting the team anyway to see if they have any children who have gone through this.

I think you need to gently push, this can make things so much easier for him. See what his concerns are and try to address them, but he's only 7, it's your call, not his.

Tbh I wouldn't push. I have two children on my caseload with this tech and neither use it very much. So it really does need to come from him or it will live in his drawer at school.

I have a BAHA . My surgery was as an adult but I'd agree with the poster above who suggested getting him to meet someone who has had the surgery proposed. What I would also say is that a BAHA can be very loud so it won't necessarily help with certain situations. I do not regret my surgery, but it is not perfect and there are times when it really is a hindrance. Hat wearing in particular is very awkward.

There are several v relevant active peer support groups on Facebook where adults and older children and their parents can help and discuss and share experiences. E.g. the 'unofficial NDCS' group, various for users of BAHAs (and related options like Osias) - just search BAHA / Cochlear / Oticon / Pronto.... Also specific groups for people with conditions where a lot of people use bone conduction options, in case relevant to you (e.g. Microtia Mingle - supportive and good archive of discussion).

One thing I would say is that according to my understanding of what our audiologists said, the difference in terms of sound between the BAHA on the band and using the magnet is really not massive. So if he is happy with and using the band, that's really great. Surgical options can be considered later. And the difference between a seven year old and e.g. a nine year old in understanding and buying into / making their own choices is large...

If he has sensorineural deafness I wonder why they are suggesting a BAHA as they are normally for conductive deafness?

Good luck with it all!