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Original poster

Things only children can get away with saying...

66 replies

SchnizelVonKrumm · 17/04/2025 14:30

DS(4) is very pleased with some new pants I bought him with a dinosaur design. So pleased that he wanted to wear them straightaway, and couldn't wait to show DP when he got home from work, saying "Daddy, I've got a surprise for you under my trousers!". It was so innocent and funny!

What have your children said that only a little child could get away with?

OP posts:
MyUmberSeal · 17/04/2025 14:32

I don’t have an example come to mind but wanted to comment on how cute that is! I hope his dad made made sure he sounded as impressed as his little boy was with his new pants.

footchewer · 17/04/2025 14:35

Apparently when I was maybe two or three I emerged from my bath and announced to the extended family "I've got tiny boobs. Mummy's got big boobs. Nana's got enormous boobs!"

Needless to say, Nana was still telling this story thirty years later!

Original poster
SchnizelVonKrumm · 17/04/2025 14:36

MyUmberSeal · 17/04/2025 14:32

I don’t have an example come to mind but wanted to comment on how cute that is! I hope his dad made made sure he sounded as impressed as his little boy was with his new pants.

They were suitably admired, yes! It was so cute. I wish I was still of an age where new pants were that exciting! 😅

OP posts:
Imperfectpolly · 17/04/2025 14:49

My nephew once said to me with great excitement 'ohhhh I didn't know you were having a baby'..... I wasn't having a baby, I was just fat 😅

ArtemisiaTheArtist · 17/04/2025 15:00

DD was about four and saw an African gentleman in the street wearing his church robes whilst we went by on a bus.

"Mummy, WHY is that man in his pyjamas?"

She's grown up now.

Imperfectpolly · 17/04/2025 15:04

ArtemisiaTheArtist · 17/04/2025 15:00

DD was about four and saw an African gentleman in the street wearing his church robes whilst we went by on a bus.

"Mummy, WHY is that man in his pyjamas?"

She's grown up now.

My DS also made a mistake like this when he was about 3. There was a lady in the supermarket head to toe in red including headdress.
'Look mummy, it's santa'.

SargeMimpson · 17/04/2025 15:33

”I love your big soft squishy tummy.” I wouldn’t take that from anyone else!!

also, “Look at your wrinkles Mummy!” I laughed and said they’re laughter lines, darling, they go when I stop smiling (then made a serious face)
”No they don’t! They’re still there, and there, and there” whilst pointing out every single one 😂😂

Mull · 17/04/2025 15:41

My DS was asking about how babies were made (think he was about 6 at the time?) I was priding myself on doing a good job (was anatomically correct but in an age appropriate way) when DS announced to DH (who had just got home from work) “Daddy, I’m going to put my penis in my wife’s vagina”!! DH’s face was a picture 😆

TheNightingalesStarling · 17/04/2025 15:41

Slightly morbid
DD was 5 when her great grandmother died. She asked us if "it was natural or did the doctor do it". Apparently one of her friends dog had recently had to visit the vet.

Fioratourer · 17/04/2025 16:04

My sister misheard and was very excited that our grandad had gone to Devon. He had actually gone to heaven.

nc0007 · 17/04/2025 16:14

DD is 4 and comes out with some outrageous stuff. ‘Mummy, that man has no hair like my grandad’ while pointing at a bloke walking past, ‘that’s Michael Jackson!’ - pointing at a random black man (luckily) outside of a cafe so he didn’t hear, ‘daddy / mummy hurt me’ at least 20 times a week in public when one of us accidentally brushes past her and we have to loudly clarify that nobody is purposely hurting anyone here. There’s heaps more but I can’t think now!

wastingtimeonhere · 17/04/2025 18:45

Overheard-
a girl of about 9.-' My dad's really old'
teacher- 'he's not that old'
girl -'yes he is, he's bald!'

scalt · 17/04/2025 18:53

ArtemisiaTheArtist · 17/04/2025 15:00

DD was about four and saw an African gentleman in the street wearing his church robes whilst we went by on a bus.

"Mummy, WHY is that man in his pyjamas?"

She's grown up now.

Perhaps she got the idea from Prince Philip, who said to the president of Nigeria in 2003 "you look as if you are ready for bed", while the president was in traditional national dress.

IleftmybaginNewportPagnell · 17/04/2025 19:09

That made me remember that, as a toddler in the pushchair, my eldest used to say “another daddy coming!” really loudly and point, whenever they saw a man. The look of panic!

Broop · 17/04/2025 19:54

One summer I was helping my 4 year old cousin brush his teeth: he was steadying himself by holding my leg and he declared ‘you have hairy legs just like daddy’…I’d only missed a couple if days shaving them!

Lilyjfree · 17/04/2025 20:32

When my nephew heard my darling cat had died, he asked me if he was now with Elvis. He then asked if the angels carried him and what would happen if they dropped him on the way. Finally he asked if he would be coming back like the ‘baby Jesus man’ did.

JadedCat · 17/04/2025 21:12

On holiday in Scotland with family including a toddler. Walking past a village church when a newly married couple were exiting, accompanied by a piper and we stopped to watch. Toddler listened to the bagpipes for a few seconds and said “Ooooh, broken.” Out of the mouths of babes……

treetop122 · 17/04/2025 21:13

My DD when she was about 3 said to a random man with a beard… My daddy has a beard and he plaits it all the way down to his tuppence!

He has a normal size beard for clarification 😂

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 17/04/2025 21:20

Why’s that lady got an orange face? (Pointing to my over made up boss, who I had bumped into and was chatting with, in the street)

RaspberryBeretxx · 17/04/2025 22:17

Ds at around 3 got the string bits on his jogging bottoms and wiggled one at me saying "mummy, look at my trouser snake!" 🤣.

Icanttakethisanymore · 17/04/2025 22:19

Mummy your tummy is so squidgy. Hmmmm - ya think?!

nc0007 · 18/04/2025 15:39

Icanttakethisanymore · 17/04/2025 22:19

Mummy your tummy is so squidgy. Hmmmm - ya think?!

That’s just reminded me of my DD constantly trying to humble me by saying ’mummy you look rough today’

Mickeychampionwhatgoodami · 18/04/2025 16:28

Things I've said as a child
Chatting to a neighbour at my grans
mr.gardener..my uncle says you're a prick.i was about 5.
Our insurance man had a limp and dad had a nickname for him..cue knock on door
I answer and shout down the hallway
Dad..it's cripple dick.
I was probably about 7.

Mickeychampionwhatgoodami · 18/04/2025 16:30

Should add this was early 70s due to language used in the last scenario.

MyUmberSeal · 18/04/2025 16:32

Mickeychampionwhatgoodami · 18/04/2025 16:30

Should add this was early 70s due to language used in the last scenario.

To be fair, I know a few cripple dicks in 2025 🤣

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