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What should I be doing about this friend

2 replies

Cookiebix · 17/04/2025 14:17

She has a big job and works long hours, although I've long suspected she uses "work" as an excuse more than she needs to and that she uses work as a distraction from real life. She also takes on a lot of responsibility for her wider family, parents, nieces and nephews etc. Her family seem close and she clearly loves them all, but I do think they take advantage (financial and practical). She is single with no DC

I won't go into detail because it's not my story, but I know she's been suicidal, struggles with not having had children and takes herself off for treatment at an inpatient rehab fairly frequently. So, often when she goes out of touch, that's where she is. She's very sad that life hasn't turned out the way she thought it would.

So, she often goes quiet or missing, but she does come away on trips or to events with our friendship group. Lately though, the odd time I've seen her she looks awful (usually looks well even when we know she's not) and has stopped coming on anything other than exercise. We're currently arranging a trip she'd usually come on and she says she can't because she has too much stuff.

She doesn't answer calls or respond to messages.

What do I do?

OP posts:
Gundogday · 17/04/2025 22:20

Can you visit her in person?

JudasTree · 17/04/2025 22:26

I much prefer being left alone when I’m very low. Friends send the occasional text that doesn’t need answering, which I appreciate, don’t pressure me to contact them, or flounce about me dropping out of contact.

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