Hi All,
So I have been with my partner for 3 years now and we have a 5 months old son. I also have a 7 year old daughter from
a previous relationship which ended amicably after 11 years and we always agreed we would remain friends for our daughters sake.
my current partner has always found it weird that we get along and has always said it’s too comfortable even though I do my absolute best to keep interactions to a minimal.
The problem is my Ex has no boundaries. He will FaceTime me with his top off and have a normal every day conversations with me about my daughter without a care in the world. Everytime I FaceTime my daughter when she is at his house, he has to join in on the conversation every time and both my and my partner get irritated by it because I spend more time talking to him than I do her and it’s annoying.
my problem is, we ended as friends and we have never really fallen out, he’s always supported me and my partner and even give our son £500 when he was born. My partner actually gets along with my ex and will talk when they see each other and again, never fallen out or had any problems.
my partner finds it disrespectful that my ex thinks it’s ok to come on FaceTime with no top on or overtake the conversation every time I FaceTime my daughter and is slowly loosing patience. I understand his point because when he makes me put the shoe on the other foot and says how would you like it if my ex FaceTimed me and she was in her bra or if I FaceTimes my kid and spent more time talking to my ex than I do my kid,I then start to loose my head 🙈
however, how do I fix this without looking like a knob? I don’t want to send a text saying “by the way, when I FaceTime can I just FaceTime our daughter and not you?” Because then it seems like I’m being controlled or something and makes me and my partner look like we’re having problems or jealousy is involved which in a way, it is but quite rightly because I know for a fact I wouldn’t like it.
I also don’t want to send a text Saying “do you mind putting your top on when you FaceTime me?” Because again, i literally see my ex as a brother now but i know that’s hard for my current partner to understand if that makes sense?
please help 🤣