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Original poster

Parents with a child in prison

32 replies

Needtofacereality · 12/04/2025 13:07

i am just interested if you a have child in prison why are they in, what crime did they commit/found guilty of?
how long will they be in for ?
do you visit ?
have you forgiven them?
have you lost friends/family because of their actions.

i saw another thread about what happens to other children if their siblings goes to prison. It just got me thinking.
hoping this doesn’t offend anyone I am just curious.

OP posts:
CountryQueen · 12/04/2025 21:06

Neverenoughbiscuits · 12/04/2025 20:39

That's certainly not been my experience - I've worked in YOI, Cat C, women, and Sex Offenders establishments.

YOI was the most volatile by far. The regime was different in that there was no freedom of movement through the estate - everyone always escorted. Education was compulsory and a painful experience for all involved. In adults this was much easier to manage and those who didn't want to be in education at least had alternative options. YOI's are hideous places and a melting pot of crimes whereas in adults jails there is some segregation ie. VIP wings or Cat A/B/C.

There was no one size fits all to family relationships. Some families stick by no matter the heinous nature of the crimes - think SA against younger sibling and then went on to reoffend against sibling's friend a few years later but all still stand by him including abused sibling. Some never had visits at all. Some very, very damaged kids in YOI who go on to become very damaged adults.

Show quote history

Yes, you describe my experience. You’re obviously not uniformed as I was describing it from a regime point of view but absolutely YOI is more volatile. They weren’t escorted though, line of sight yes, always escorted, impossible.

There are no “sex offender” establishments either. Units that delivered primarily SOTP and other related programmes within the wider establishment, yes of course.

Fordian · 12/04/2025 21:24

I was friends with someone at work who’d been a prison guvnor. Said YOIs were the most dangerous place for young offenders, as they all bravado’ed and egged each other on. Said the best influences in these young hotheads were experienced prison officers, who were all made redundant a few years ago, to save cash (that was never ‘out there’, was it?), and old ‘lifers’, old blokes imparting fatherly advice to them.

An aside, in my frontline NHS job, we’d treat prisoners from nearby. I saw the change from 20 years ago to 10 when the prisoners would’ve turned up shackled to older officers, chatting normally to them; to young hotheaded, bravado’ed cock-sure OFFICERS who I’D have to pull back into line, as they tried to throw their 12 week training weight around.

Neverenoughbiscuits · 12/04/2025 21:26

CountryQueen · 12/04/2025 21:06

Yes, you describe my experience. You’re obviously not uniformed as I was describing it from a regime point of view but absolutely YOI is more volatile. They weren’t escorted though, line of sight yes, always escorted, impossible.

There are no “sex offender” establishments either. Units that delivered primarily SOTP and other related programmes within the wider establishment, yes of course.

Show quote history

HMP Stafford is a jail for men convicted of Sexual Offences.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Crime Families
CountryQueen · 12/04/2025 21:45

Ah yes, another re-role and the aftermath of the SOTP fall out. You’re right, that one passed me by. I have actually been there with work briefly but it was pre 2014 and at the time all sensible advice was against having offence based custodial establishments. Seems they ignored that!

Regardless, my point was that juveniles were, and still are, held within prisons.

AngryLikeHades · 12/04/2025 21:46

BitOutOfPractice · 12/04/2025 13:24

If I had a child in prison I’m not sure I’d want to spill my most intimate feelings about it for your idle curiosity.

My thoughts.

FigTreeInEurope · 13/04/2025 07:05

Neverenoughbiscuits · 12/04/2025 21:26

HMP Stafford is a jail for men convicted of Sexual Offences.

Show quote history

So is HMP wakefield, pretty much. It's in the dispersal system, but largely houses sex offenders.

finallyskinny · 13/04/2025 20:15

Neverenoughbiscuits · 12/04/2025 21:26

HMP Stafford is a jail for men convicted of Sexual Offences.

Show quote history

also HMP Whatton

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