How to message support to friend? Work harassment

[Qqthrwy]

stupid question but I have ASD and really don’t want to say the wrong thing to a friend who has recently experienced sexual harassment at work (multiple instances of inappropriate comments from her male colleague).

She has reported the guy to HR, had to make a formal statement. I had already told her she was really brave for reporting it and wished everything went well.

when I asked how it went she mentioned HR has passed on her name and statement to the guy which has made her extra nervous

I was just wondering how best would you appropriately respond to a friend in this situation? I want to be supportive but scared to say the wrong thing, currently blanking on what to reply and want to respond timely during a difficult time

i think you just need to let her know you are there if she needs you.

"Oh that's a bit shit. Hope it's all sorted soon".

She knows you're being supportive, otherwise she wouldn't have replied to your message.

Please don’t say this - it sounds like she’s dinged her car, or missed a parcel delivery.

I would tell her that you’re available to talk if she feels like chatting - that it sounds like a really difficult situation but she should take comfort from the fact that she’s done the right thing and that her actions will help to protect other women in the workplace.

she won’t be allowed to talk to anyone about it while it’s being investigated. You could be called as a witness. Let her know you’re thinking of her but don’t ask anything in relation to the case itself.

Not to mention that they are allegations. The guy hasn’t been found at fault yet.

Thanks, I don’t actually work at her company or know any of her colleagues

I wasn’t going to ask specifics of the case anyway though

Well there's no point in going full on drama queen about it, is there?

It is a bit shit but she would've known the procedure so it won't be a shock.

She's now nervous about it, so hopefully it'll be over soon.

This is a terrible message to send. Sounds so dismissive.

In your position I'd reply-
'I'm sorry you're going through this, please let me know if you want to talk things through. Or if you need any help getting through this'

Definitely don’t say this. It sounds really dismissive if you don’t know the tone of voice, which you never do over email/text.

I would say “Oh gosh I can see how that would be worrying. Let me know if you ever need to talk - I’m always here.”

I'd go for something along the lines of "I'm sorry you're going through this. Im here for you if I can support in any way at all. Very best wishes to you"

So you're a friend NOT a work colleague?

Message and say that you are thinking of her and you're available if she wants to chat.

Huh? Did you read the OP? This person was sexually harassed at work. There’s nothing “drama queen” about acknowledging that this is a horrible thing to happen and that taking the steps to report it can be a stressful experience.