Early teen drinking/party query…

[Blinkingbother]

Hi all, sorry - I’ve name changed as have spoken to dsis about this and don’t want her recognising me and checking out any other comments I may have made on other threads!!…..Please can I get a sense check with you? Youngest DC is Year 9 at school so they are 13/14yrs old. We live rurally. The year group have regular parties held in parents’ barns/outbuildings which involve alcohol provided by the parents (usually 2 or 3 bottles/cans of beer/cider/alcopops per child) but of course plenty sneak in their own (nicked from parents I guess) too. I have older kids and am absolutely not averse to teens trying alcohol and hopefully learning to drink responsibly - we offer our older teens a beer or glass of wine at home if we’re having etc and they will have a drink or 2 at a party but I think this sort of drinking at yr9 is a bit too early?…or am I a prude/partypooper?! ….the other parents seem to think their 13/14 year olds getting drunk (and handsy down the bottom of the field etc with each other whilst drunk) is hugely funny….I think it’s really not a good idea. TIA.

Bumping….

Er... no.

No way would I think this is OK.

Once they're in 6th form I would let them have parties and provide my kid (nobody else's) with a couple of ciders or beers or alcopops. Guests can bring only reasonable amounts of similar drinks. No spirits allowed at the party.

And I would reserve the right to walk through the party regularly and watch out for inappropriate behaviour or excessive drinking.

I don't even give a shit whether I'm a prude or a party pooper. 13/14 year olds are not drinking unsupervised on my watch. 16 year olds can drink moderately under the conditions above.

Way too young ! This is a complete recipe for distaste’s and there is no way my child would going to a party like this.

I think I'd probably be ok with 15/16 in moderation but 13/14 seems too young.
I say this as someone who used to go to back to school club nights in my actual school uniform (with some modifications), with parental knowledge, so I'm not a stickler for no alcohol until 18

No it's too young .I do think 16 is OK under family supervision ie a beer at a family party .

I think y9 is way too young especially given they are unsupervised, sneaking more alcohol in and ‘getting handsy’ while drunk - ugh. Recipe for disaster right there.

Most parents here allow a few drinks at home or a party from around 16 (y11?) onwards?

Thanks all - I was starting to think I was way out of touch! The other parents seem to think it’s perfectly normal and encourage it all. Agree it’s a disaster waiting to happen - not just on the booze front but also on the potential consent for whatever’s going on between those that ‘get together’ too…

I started drinking at 13 but it was a bad idea. I think 16 is reasonable.

In my opinion 13/14 year olds shouldn’t be drinking at parties. I have a 14 year old girl and wouldn’t want her drinking at parties till she was older. Her older brother was given a the option to have a beer when we were out at about 17 and a drink from home from 16 just so when he did reach 18 he didn’t go mad because he had never tasted it before. 13/14 is too young though in my opinion.

Thank you…. That most seem to be agreement with me thus far is reassuring that im not nuts!!!

I have a year 9 DD and she absolutely would not be allowed to do this! We live rurally too but it’s not the done thing here. I’d allow a small glass of alcohol at home from about 16, but 13 when out with friends is ridiculous

Way too young, and I don't consider myself a strict parent. Ds is 17. He gpes to parties where there is alcohol, and has done since he was 16. Any younger than that is not on imo.

No this is nuts. The parents facilitating this are a disgrace and tbh probably need reporting to the police

My 14 yo wouldn’t even be enticed by this, and if she was I wouldn’t let her.
Wtf is wrong with these parents

I let mine take 2 bottles of blue wicked or small fruity ciders at that age. The ones that parents didn't allow them anything whatsoever were the ones sneaking stronger spirits and going home in a state.