Carers for elderly parents, need a virtual hug.

[Tolkienista]

I'm honestly not on here for advice, rather I want to hear what other people are going through because I'm feeling more overwhelmed as each week passes by.
I'm a year into helping with my 95 year old mother who's been in a care home since last July and still needs support and help in adjusting to her new life.
She lived independently until 94 years of age and one fall changed her life completely .

I'm one of three, I'm my mother's next of kin too and I don't resent what I do to support her, but my siblings leave a lot of it to me including attending appointments and dealing with visitors, financial affairs etc.

So please share how you feel if indeed you feel like it's getting harder by the week.
My next door neighbour called round earlier about something completely different and I just unloaded a lot of stuff to her. I really needed it.
She said she has at least three friends who are going through exactly the same as me and are feeling the same levels of exhaustion too and despair.
Thanks for your time in reading this, please share your thoughts.

It isn’t easy.

You are doing a great job and it’s a frankly thankless task trying to care for elderly relatives, and you cannot pour from an empty cup. Take all the time and support you need and try to establish some boundaries or off time for yourself.

Try reposting this on the Elderly Parents/Relatives board where you will find much more support & responses.

Thank you for your lovely inspiring words.
Yes I should have put it on the elderly parents forum.
Thought chat section would be a wider audience..
We'll see.

I've put this on the wrong forum , can anyone help me to move it to Elderly parents forum?

I think if you click on report post and then select 'Other' and explain you would like it moved.

Looking after olds is without doubt the most stressful thing I've ever done and the Elderly Parents forum was an absolute life saver. It does help just to sound off to people wh9 understand but there's a lot of helpfully advice too.

MIl was the worst as she had bad Alzheimer's and dealing with that when she had to go into hospital was an experience, it was the tail end of Covid so getting to talk to anyone and trying to visit was a nightmare.

My DF is just coming up to 92 and is still managing independently, but I know only too well how quickly things can go sideways.

Good luck, I might see you on the other forum!

Thanks for your lovely words.
I couldn't see a clear and easy way to do it, so I've just rewritten the whole thing and posted it on Elderly parents now.

I honestly can't praise this forum enough, it's got me through many a dark time when I've had a day full of responsibilities, people are so kind and giving
As I've said, I'm not looking for advice I know what's ahead and it's just so tough at times and hard to say I'm not available.
Thanks again, see you on the other forum 🙂