So 6 weeks before the A levels, my son tells me this (possible ADHD)

[blueshoes]

6 weeks before the A levels, my son has admitted that despite all the timetables he did, the hours studying at home and notes he has written, he has not taken anything in. He just cannot get himself motivated to study.

For his GCSEs, it was the same thing. He performed below expectations. I thought he had cracked it but he kept it from dh and I. It has got worse for the A levels😓

For his recent A level mocks, he only watched videos for 4-5 hours before the actual exam. He got A (fave subject), B and C. All below his predicted grades and below the conditional offers he got for university.

Does anyone recognise this in their dcs or themselves. What can you advise for ds?

Could this be ADHD? Appreciate this is the eleventh hour. We are willing to go private for diagnosis and medication, if that is even a possibility.

He needs to do past papers. He must start immediately. He can learn a lot and he will have to.

Thank you! He has been doing a lot of past exam papers or so he tells me. I don't know what to believe.

Thanks @way2serious ds sounds similar. Glad it finally clicked in place for your ds.

At some point you just need to leave them to it and be there to catch them if they fall.

Sit and plan out different routes with him, E.g if uni is for him now, later, or not at all. Possible clearing routes, retakes, careers. Maybe suggest to him he speaks to a teacher he gets on well with, they may be able to give him a better perspective.

But at this stage the revision is really up to him, you sound like you’ve supported him a lot with planning, checking in etc, and he’s at an age where there’s only so much you can and should do.

Ds wants to do Economics at university. He is really looking forward to it and the whole university experience. He is disappointed in himself and yes, you are right that he knows there is the added pressure of disappointing his parents which is why he kept it bottled up for so long 😪I just want to help him figure this out.

Yup, the exam system does not help with everything hanging on 1 major exam after 2 years of work.

This is great. Ds is going to do bodying doubling for the first week of Easter and then if that is not working, try out Physics for the second week at MPW.

You might need to take the phone off him for periods if he can’t revise with it because he’s getting distracted. Have set times where he is allowed it.

Not taking itself isn’t great for getting information to stick. He need to be retrieving that info regularly to make it stay. Is he taking the notes in Q&A format and regularly going through the questions. Something like Anki might help.

Get him to teach you or DH stuff.

Is he at a private school?

This is very helpful. Have forwarded to ds.

Ds has a question about the MPW courses. Do you know whether it is for students who are already well versed in the topics and want a last minute polish, or is it for students who need to start from ground up. Ds falls in the latter category.

He got an a b and c, if he was genuinely adhd he would probably not been put forward for the higher paper. Are you applying a lot of pressure on him? He’s getting really good grades? Back off and don’t put so much importance on these results, tell him he is able to resit? Tell him if at 30 he hates the degree he chose, change his life path. Stop pressuring him. He’s not a reflection of you, he’s himself

Why is A, B and C not good enough? Where is the pressure coming from to do better? He did well enough to get onto his A level course. University won't be a natural next step - if that's why the sudden panic? - if he doesn't feel he can self study/learn.

To be fair it’s 1-9 now I was told at parents evening a 4 is a c?

@blueshoes Have you spoken to his subject teachers? The Feynman technique is very useful when applied to hitting the AOs of the awarding body. Subject teachers should be advising how and where your DS has gaps/needs to target revision, based on his mocks. This can help as removes the all consuming pressure to revise everything he's learnt (ie all content) in past two years...
Hope this helps 🙌🏼

Yes

Yes it does 🙏Will try the Fenman technique. We have had our parents evening so ds knows where he is weak. Ds says he will try to explain to me some of his 25 mark exam questions.

Don't leave him in his room with his phone. I'd actually suggest a locked box for the phone and you have the key! Do not underestimate phone addiction especially when there is some low level cortisol stress running through his mind about exams.

www.focusmate.com is online body doubling.

Also - revision cards and even (this is what I did) flipchart paper on the walls with mind maps. Mind maps are brilliant for ADHD.

Past papers - absolutely 100% do past papers even if its just in the couple of weeks before, as it simulates the exam and builds confidence.

I have ADHD and crammed and got straight A's.

I think the biggest challenge with ADHD is Procrastination. Idk but I've overcome it by fucking up so many times that I just know the consequences and prefer to avoid them. We all have a bad day but its about saying okay tomorrow is a fresh day and not letting it run into multiple bad days as that's when you fall behind. Once you get past the mentality of beating yourself up over Procrastination, The challenge is getting started which is actually pretty easy to beat - put a song on and a 10 min timer and lie that you will only do 10 mins. I've never stopped at 10 mins.

If you are glued to the phone, stick one arm in the air and wiggle it around, then lift one leg and the other and place on floor, slide until you on the floor, count to 5 and stand up 😂

At this stage in the UCAS applications, Ds has already got his offers from the universities. They are based on his school's predicted grades AAA which are higher than ABC. His school believes he can get it. Ds also believes he can too. Hence he is so frustrated at being unable to motivate himself.

Past papers are all well and good but they need to be marked to be of real benefit if they are essay subjects.

he is spiralling. He doesn’t have six weeks. He might have six weeks until the first exam but that’s just one paper and he will have longer to revise for the later subjects.

if he can do a couple of hours a day that’s a good start and he can build from there.

They all do it though. My year 13 has suddenly had a desperate need this evening for the bedroom which has been an utter pigsty for the past five years to be immaculate so can’t do revision. When I suggested revision was a better plan I was told it was impossible to revise in a mess..

Procrastination and avoidance.

He wants to do Economics at University and got offers for that course. He is 18 and is an adult. He wants to get there and not got much more to go. He just wants to know why he cannot seem to motivate himself.

Once he is a uni, he will be doing his favourite subject so I am less worried.

I want him to realise his dreams. They are not my dreams but his. As his parent, I will support him.

This is about A levels not GCSEs

This is key. Break down the AOs of the question (your eg of 25 marker being exactly what I mean) and focus on that.
Little and often, targeted and honing (including referring to mark schemes), question by question. It's methodical and will be less overwhelming. Master one, on to the next, so to speak.
OP, my DS was the same and I've been in a class room 25 years!
He'll get there 💪🏼
PS DS begins MA at KCL in Sept so keep the faith ✊🏼