What do working parents do about school holidays?

[Terracottafarmers]

Inspired by another post: We’re thinking about trying for a baby soon, and I’m curious how do working parents manage the 6 weeks of summer holidays and all the other school breaks (Christmas, Easter, half-terms, inset days) when you both work? With only 28 days of annual leave each, how do you cover it all? Do you rely on family, after school clubs, or flexible working. We will both have to return to work pretty much as soon as we can so any tips will be appreciated

Single parent here 🙋‍♀️

I look at it as more of an annual project with a spreadsheet. I find breaking weeks up easier than full weeks in childcare too so a week off will be a combination of holiday clubs/a few days off for me where we’ll go out and do something/hopefully a playdate.

You have to plan for the expenses - I use on average 20 days of holiday camps a year so put that money aside monthly and it doesn’t sting as much!

I intentionally put effort into becoming friends with other working parents at DSs school and we tend to get a few playdate swaps in per holiday. I find it easier to look after DS/friends outside anyway so I’ll try and make them very fun days out so the kids ask for more time with us in the holidays (and then I get more swaps 😂🫠)

Finding a job in a flexible company/industry was also key, and a decision I made partially due to childcare. If any childcare falls through, I’ll just work the morning whilst DS watches TV/plays and then make up any other hours in the evenings/on another day so we can do something in the afternoon. It’s rare but a lifesaver occasionally.

Juggle with dh taking days and me having certain days (retail), camps, we had more regular childcare but twice I was told it wasn’t working as I didn’t know my days enough in advance. I’ve also had to leave a job as they told me it wasn’t working out (son was out sick and I was getting phone calls asking me to collect him and twice I had to leave work when they didn’t agree I could. Dh was away at the time.) It’s hard op but you get used to juggling and figuring stuff out somehow. Personally I’d say it’s all worth it

We both work full time. Between 2 people, annual leave and holiday clubs we work it out. My mum does 1 week of it.

Annual leave.
Unpaid parental leave (booked ahead in blocks of one week)
Holiday clubs, these are hit and miss though and one of my children could only cope with one. She was too upset at the larger, noisy venues.

i Worked nights and my DH worked days. I hated it but did this while my children needed me to take them to school. As soon as they were in secondary school and could get the bus I changed back to days. Really tough but we got there.

This is the point where you realise you should have had kids younger or lived closer to family! Because you need free childcare otherwise it’s a struggle.

When the kids are very little it’s more difficult because they need supervising. When they’re a bit older you can work from home while they potter around the house. So for example DH can take half days for a week on a WFH basis, he does 4hrs work per day while DC play, then takes them out for a bit.

I also see lots of mums (including myself) trying to start businesses. Purely because they need more flexibility and time off than an employer will offer.

We never have any holidays together as a family - we always have to split it for childcare reasons. The only time we’re off work together is Xmas and bank holidays.

Interested also as my childcare has changed this year and I'm not quite sure how to manage it. There are no summer clubs near me that run full days. There would be some summer clubs that are eg 9.30-1.30 but I work 9-5.30.

We have no GP support so have to do everything ourselves or pay someone to do it.

DH and I both made sure we had plenty of money and WFH jobs before having DS.

The logistics are still tough but manageable. If we were both office based at work one of us would have had to give up work as tern time pick ups and holiday cover would have been impossible.

We use holiday clubs, family isn't an option and I don't want to use friends as I'll need to reciprocate.

Im fortunate, my employer is very into flexible working and wfh so I always wfh during inset days (they are the problem - no holiday clubs for those!). Basically I can't leave this employer whilst my dcs are at school!

We don't have any family support nearby so DH and I manage it between us and we use holiday clubs for the rest.

It can be a bit pants as DH and I split the holiday e.g I'll cover one of the weeks at Easter and he'll cover the other one. We only get time off together around Christmas and for one week in the summer as we'll both take two weeks off but overlap the middle week to go on holiday as a family so we've covered three weeks between us.

Other than that it's holiday club which is expensive but still cheaper than when they were at nursery. DH and I don't have enough leave to cover school holidays between us so holiday club it is.

We often find it best to mix weeks up e.g take a couple of days off and they go to club for three days one week and two days the next rather than a full week. It makes the weeks more varied and means they're never in holiday club full time.

Inset days are the hardest as there's no holiday club for those. Fortunately now they're getting a bit older we can usually cover it by WFH and them having a day in front of the TV which isn't ideal but the only option if we don't have enough leave to cover it.

We used childcare /clubs & annual leave.

Feb, May and October half term we would each take a couple of days off and used childcare - local
stables used to run adhoc days so would fit in around them.

Easter one week together and use clubs.

Summer 2 weeks together and 3 weeks club and 1 week would be split with grandparents.

Christmas was a mix of what days we had left!

We used childcare vouchers and had to make sure we had savings. My eldest was happy to go to the local council run sports centre. Youngest preferred Drama camps or smaller group type ones so was more expensive.

Girls are now 15 & 22 - was very stressful and dont miss the trying to organise it all!

I'm a single parent and whilst my DF was with us he helped. I used a mixture of leave, holiday clubs, flex working and as my DS got older I'd have his friends over and their parents would have him over. It was very difficult and expensive. When he went to high school it was 20 weeks holiday.

The pre school years are ‘easier’ as childminders and nurseries don’t close as much however they are expensive.
The years from reception to year 8/9 are the most challenging.
kids dad has them maybe 10 days a year in the holidays and I pay my childminder a set amount monthly to cover the holidays as well.

@TheDandyKhakiDuck I’m sorry that you are a widowed parent and appreciate that it must be very difficult - but I think it’s unfair to dismiss it as a “doddle” and “cheap” for 2 parent families.

We are a 2 parent household but DH works away from home for 4 weeks at a time on a set rotation which we can’t move. So depending on the year he can be home for 4 weeks out of the summer (will be very helpful obviously) and home over Christmas etc or he can be away over Easter, 4 weeks of the summer, and away right over Christmas etc. We have no family that are willing to help with childcare so don’t have the grandparents to help out. There is one holiday club near us but it only does half days and is for kids 8+. I work 8.30-6pm four days per week with no option to WFH or compress hours or anything. I don’t get bank holidays. And my work is closed on Xmas Day and New Year’s Day only. My work was incredibly flexible prior to the lockdowns hence us planning DCs while I was working there but after having to restructure and half the staffing to stay afloat afterwards they’ve brought in so many restrictions on annual leave etc that it makes it impossible (eg, no annual leave for the 2 weeks over Xmas/new year and a maximum of 10 days annual leave between start May and end Oct as it’s our busiest time!)

DC are currently in nursery so it works as nursery are open all year other than 10 days over Christmas and bank holidays. Next year we hit the school years and have no option other than for me to leave work and attempt to find something more flexible as childcare costs would far exceed what we can afford. And more flexible roles are extremely hard to come by local to us.

I also have an autoimmune disorder to try and manage which is triggered by stress and lack of rest.

Everyones personal situation is different.

When ds was born it was evident that he had complex needs and accessing childcare was impossible, so after initially stopping working, I got a job working in a preschool and then a school.

We’re working parents…we’ll do a mixture of splitting annual leave so my husband and I are off at different times, unpaid parental leave, clubs, swapping childcare was with school friend parents. However does anyone else feel this isn’t how life should be and resent it a little? That we should be able to relax and spend time together with partners and children and not feel you have a big logistical problem to solve to ensure work can be done? No answers only moaning.

@Seaside31 yes everyone’s situation is different. I was speaking to the OP’s situation though - 2 parents with 28 days leave each - not you! 😊

Never both been full time, we have (and provide) family help and for the bulk of DCs schooling years our work has also been quite flexible. We're also lucky that both our employers are fine with pretty much all annual leave being used in school holidays. DH also gets some grant days over Christmas, which stretches leave further.

I am just about to have a school aged child and my intention is:

• all annual leave taken separately
• a week or two of unpaid parental leave
• holiday clubs or childminder
• childcare swaps with friends

I also work part time which really helps as we don’t have to cover 5 days

Last year I planned it because the year before was stressful! We only have in laws who are fab but in their 70s with a severely disabled adult son who lives at home.

we took two weeks each annual leave overlapping for one week so we had a week together, summer club for one week then just winged it with some help for two weeks! I do shift work and mostly lates so usually start at 4pm husband finishes at 5/6pm.

Holiday clubs
annual leave
the odd day wfh
a few days with grandparents
it’s not impossible…

I was a single parent with no family very nearby to be able to help.
Fortunately the primary school had an after school club that we already used and it turned into a holiday club over the holidays and those of us that used the after school club had the priority for places.
I also used as much annual leave as possible during the holidays so I could maximise the time off I spent with my son.

I mixture of annual leave, holiday clubs, trading with us families (on my week off I had their kids and vice versa), my parents would cover 1 week per year, I would go in really early (6am) and he would drop the kids at my finish time then go to work until mid evening

We have two ND kids, no childcare around here will take them (rural Scotland) and we have basically no family help. Trading childcare with friends not an option either as no-one wants to be friends with/look after them. I work part time and luckily my job is flexible so in the holidays I work evenings and weekends whilst my partner does 8-5, and we use our holiday seperately. Sometimes we have had to leave them on screens for a few hours while we WFH but they are older, you can't do that with younger kids really though some people manage it.

Dreading this a bit when I return from maternity leave in September as dh and I will both be full time. Ds1 is reception age now. We don’t have family nearby. Dh job is a bit more flexible and he does get more holiday than me. It’ll have to be a a mix of separate annual leave, maybe a week or 2 shared a year and some unpaid. We have some good holiday clubs near us so I’ll do a bit of that but not all day. It seems a bit intense. I’d rather not do a reciprocal childcare arrangement with other parents. I’d rather muddle through and don’t fancy looking after other kids on my limited time off