Thread 17 - TalkLair: "Okay, first of all, what's with the outfit? Live in the now, okay? You look like DeBarge."

[RasaSayangEh]

(Previous thread 16).

Spring is springing, daffodils blooming all over our LairGarden, which have not all been picked by a neighbour's kid...

In the TalkLair, the hearth is glowing, books by non-approved authors line the shelves, cosy rugs are down on the floors looking a bit stained by cat hairball regurgitation. The denizens of the lair are a welcoming bunch though, always eager for general chit-chat on all manner of topics. We just won’t mention the gnawed bones of our prey over there in the corner of the cave…

Forgot to mention @Gonners that you are spot-on with the next line of the song, well remembered!

Oh, our telly came on unbidden a few times, last year. I didn't connect it with dying batteries, which I replaced because it wasn't working. It still had the unbranded ones it came with - in July 2008!

I had an old telly in around 1980 and tried to watch Star Wars on it but every time one of the light sabres was used it turned off and on again, which made the film unwatchable.

I had an odd, "Shit I think I'm going to need to call an ambulance!" Yesterday evening, although not for me, so phew for that!

A couple of houses along a woman was shouting help over and over. She was sort of leaning against her garden wall, holding her stomach. Pregnant? Why was no one helping, just passing ger by? Drunk?

I could put it off no longer and called 999, at which point I realised how difficult that might be.. I had a minor "I can only whisper" moment of forgetting. And of course, within less than a minute of a lovely ambulance woman talking to me out pops, probably "help" woman's husband appears to help her in while I explain thr what and the why and the sorry I have cancer which means I'm whispering.

What larks! Still, it added a little drama to the evening and no one was hurt, thankfully.

@FagsMagsandBags it would probably be a good idea to register for the 999 text service, in case you need to call them when you don't have a voice. www.mwis.org.uk/blog/post/999-text-service

Good plan re registering for the text service.

I am currently mulling over the appropriate reply to MrG's elder son, the self-important total prat one. Context is that he wants to Skype me and I told him a week ago that my mic isn't working and I'd be in touch asap. (Okay, I may have lied about the latter ...) At 9 this morning (1 in the morning his time!) I received this:

Thanks for the note, we’d still like to connect with you to discuss Dad’s condition. Let me know what days/times would work best for you this week. Looking forward to chatting soon.

MrG asked if I was going to reply "Fuck off you pompous git" or if I'd like him to do it. I am currently working out the most absolutely inconvenient time for him that is less inconvenient for his brother, a mere 4 hours time difference away. I still don't have a working mic, but who cares? My job is not to speak, but simply to listen to his words of wisdom.

Re ending with drugs on the previous thread.

I first took LSD sometime before 1995. I took a half and wasn't coming up so took the other half just as I started coming up. Oops. My biggest memory from that night was watching MC Hammer and the acid did mad stuff to his big trousers. Also, bizarre sex. No thank you. After that mushrooms. One trip was particularly awful and I was helped through it by Donna Summer singing State of Independence for which I am forever grateful. No bad trips after that but I became very much an alpha version of myself which I wasn't overly keen on. Although I could be quite funny with it. I think the last time we did mushrooms someone cried because they didn't want to eat little baby chickpeas. We watched three films. Sleepless in Seattle which was appallingly bad, something I've forgotten and a film that I don't recommend on any sort of hallucinagen (sp?) Groundhog Day. I love that film but good grief it felt all of a million years long watching it.

Other than that, cannabis in myriad forms but it's been ruined by skunk which is not good stuff, cocaine which turns one into the most deadly of "I know EVERYTHING ME!" bores and therefore should only be done around other peopole also on it or best yet. Not at all. Speed, ecstacy, opium and of late actual prescription opiods, so you know, I'm respectable now. I hadn't done anything other than hard to find not skunk for decades and it's been at least five years since I did the latter. I played with drugs which was neither very sensible at all nor of long lasting detremint to me unlike my poor brother. Mostly, it's been my observation, that drugs make boring people more boring and interesting people pretty damn boring. Get high on life, dudes. Or something!

I've finally been gifted with flowers. It took long enough! A nice bunch of something exotic from M&S, a small orchid that I gifted myself (sort of pink and white), a bigger yellow orchid which is lush McGill and looking good and a small but beautiful bunch of yellow roses with what I think will be yellow carnations but could be cream ones. Yellow because the buyer - hello Snoop - knows I love yellow roses. The area around my bedroom window, which is where I look from my bed, looks gorgeous and it's made me feel even comfier than I have. There's been a lot of clearing up which also helps. I have very few clothes left because frankly, I don't need them and if I do need something, why, I shall buy it!
Today's tidying had me forcing people to leave the bedroom twice. First time I'd forgotten the "password" Snoop and I made up years ago which is "Brace" and means run, but she got out just in time. The second time, I recalled it and kept saying it and she was all "What?!" and I ended up almost shouting my whisper of "Brace, woman, for fuck's sake, brace. I'm about to blow!" When asked how I was making such an awful stench from my poor bottom area I replied that it might have a little something to do with cancer! It's a bit better this evening and thankfully my darling Fat boy Fat isn't bothered at all by my fragrant farty bottom so all is well.

The sun was out for a while this morning and I got to meet a dog Snoop looks after on Tuesdays. He's called Wilf and he's a Bedlington x whippet lurcher all a grey and fluffy and greedy and cuddly. It was a lovely meeting.

I hope others have had at least good parts of the day and not too much fragrant farting!😁

I haven't done psychedelics unless some dodgy looking tablets labelled 'LSD' purchased from a late night market stall in Middlesbrough when I was 15 count. I have been offered mushrooms but I was too scared they'd make me sick. I've done most other things though. MDMA never had much of an effect on me for some reason. A friend and I did a whole bag between us and even snorted some (which seemed like a very good idea at the time). He was off his face whereas I just felt things were slightly more surreal than usual. I did get quite jaw clenchy though. I'd like to try LSD to see if it would help me with grief. I've read that it can help a lot but I've also read accounts from people who've had complete breakdowns from bad trips.

The closest I've come to tripping was when I had some hashish in France. I was no stranger to weed or hash so just smoked it like a fag, but it hit me like a tonne of bricks. I was staying in the middle of nowhere so wandered off into the woods and into some kind of Alice in Wonderland experience. Everything around me was so HUGE and I could 'see' bright red. Then I got this sense that I was going to fall through the ground and into a hole so I started walking in a really strange way. There was some sort of metal fence up ahead and it dawned on me that maybe I had been in prison all along and over the other side was freedom. When I got back to the house I sat for what felt like a very long time, speechless and rocking back and forth slightly.

Hooray for flowers. I absolutely love orchids and have a little collection on my windowsill. I had to stop myself from buying another last week. I have one that's just started to flower again after 18 months of dormancy.

Kasper had his annual checkup yesterday. I'm fortunate to have an amazing home visit vet who work exclusively with cats so his stress was kept to a minimum and he got lots of fuss. He's perfect in every way, except his teeth. British shorthairs are very prone to dental issues because their faces are on the flatter side. The gums around his lower molars are really red and inflamed, so he's got to have them out. The vet said it would be a good idea to have his upper molars out at the same time even though they're not too bad at the moment so that he doesn't have to go through it all again, which sounds very sensible.

I'm absolutely petrified of him being under GA though. She talked me through every step, and every precaution she takes, including making him the only patient of the day, but it's still terrifying. I found myself asking her if the risks were comparable to a human child undergoing GA and realised afterwards how mental I sounded. He was very unwell when he was a kitten after he aspirated on his vomit and the ordeal gave me massive cat health anxiety.

I know it needs to be done because his teeth must feel so sore, but I genuinely don't know how I'm going to cope on the day. I feel like I will need to be put under GA at the same time.

Three post ment: here he is last night, still dozy after all the fuss and lick e lix (and the gabapentin I slipped him in the morning).

Poor soon-to-be-gummy Kasper. If it's any consolation I used to work at a vets and we must have anaesthetised half a dozen cats on an average day. Never saw one have a problem.

I go a bit loopy on certain food colourings, and can't tolerate a full dose of paracetamol without feeling woozy, so apart from alcohol in moderation I've always steered clear of anything stronger.

@NoBinturongsHereMate that is actually enormously comforting, thank you. The vet said cats have the perfect metabolism for GA which sounded interesting, but I’m refraining from googling anything at all about it. Best to stick to my 15 open tabs on CCR5.

Thank you for mentioning paracetamol, @NoBinturongsHereMate you reminded me I am due one after my oramorph which I've just done. Because I weigh a lot less than I did I can't take the same dosage as a normal adult which doesn't bother me but they can help just give that tiny extra kick to the morphine which helps. Looking forward to having the long lasting morphine in tablet alongside top up throughout the day, I think it'll really add to the quality of my life right now. Especially at around 4-4.30am!

@VictorianBigot Kaspar will honestly be fine. My Francis is going to live in a household with a newly qualified vet's nurse. She looked after a kitten in a dreadful state for long enough so that the kitten was heavy enough to have life-saving surgery, bits not in the right place, hanging out a bit, all very difficult. Anyway, the kitten was a marvel and saw it through the GA with no trouble at all despite weighing virtually nothing. They are really, really good, they know how much to use and it will be so quick that he'll be under for the shortest of times and then just a happy gummy buy afterwards. You won't have long to worry because he'll be under for such a short time. I understand how scary it is but you will both be fine. I can almost promise that.

I should get some sleep now as I have therapy tomorrow. It'll probably be our last session because I'm not sure where we go from here but I shall miss her. I just have so much medical stuff going on and I can get a bit of help or a nice massage - I really want the latter - from the hospice or MacMillan or someone. I think that I'll be leaving any money that I have left over, or asking for donations to the hospice when I'm gone. They've been so much better than anyone else so far. Although any money - which will be a very small amount - would be better going to a friend who's as poor as I am and needs it more than anyone I know. So, a few pence for her then!

Oh and alcohol. I hardly drink these days and haven't for years. I had a shandy earlier this year I think. I do fancy a nice cocktail though and might have one soon-ish. Or not. Probably doesn't go well with prescription drugs.

Wise words upthread, there, FMG, not least the

It hit me like a tonne of bricks, and once in a blue moon, that happens, and you think, WTAF? And hopefully, that's just a great little moment in life.

I’m glad you have lovely flowers to bring you joy, Fags!

Plenty of alcohol in my younger days but no drugs to speak of and these days I seldom drink and when I do it’s not much.

My arm is now showing massive bruises and it’s hard to find comfortable positions to sit in. I’m also finding getting out of bed one armed unexpectedly difficult. I think the last few years of stay at home mum care have destroyed what little strength I had really (plus I’m way too fat for my own good) so I think some attempt at regaining a bit of fitness must be made once I can do more. The bed thing is also down to my mattress I think. It’s a hybrid one and when I got it I found the soft edge made it harder to get myself sitting up in bed than my ancient spring mattress but kept it because it was better in every other way and it was just so nice not to have constant backaches. I suspect there’s a mattress out there that would be better though.

I’m glad you’ve got nice flowers @FagsMagsandBags. I love to have fresh flowers in the house - makes a noticeable difference to my mood.

Thank you for the flowers appreciation, people. @Britinme that's how I feel about them, a noticeable difference to my mood. It was lovely waking up to them this morning and helped me be less pissed off that pain had still arrived, at about 06.15 rather than 04.30 when I thought I'd sorted it overnight. Dagnabbit! I'll call St Barnabas in a while to check that my big prescription went through yesterday although I suspect it's the pharmacy who are rubbish.

Moan, moan. Which I know is allowed but I'd rather not.

I seldom drink and when I do it’s not much.

The sunlight is hitting my laptop in such a way that I read that as 'when I do it's in church'.

@FagsMagsandBags Thank you, that's also very reassuring. He will be under for 2.5 - 3 hours apparently as they will do blood tests and x rays first, some scaling and polishing of the teeth he'll keep, the extractions and then the suturing. He'll also have 1-1 attention in the lead up to the pre-med. They do the surgery from a mobile clinic so there'll be no other animals there to stress him out.

I follow a cat rescue woman on instagram who had a kitten that suddenly became quite ill. He had some scans and it turned out his organs were in the wrong places - was that what happened to the kitten your vet nurse friend was looking after? That was a really complicated surgery but he came away fine.

@artant The bed thing is also down to my mattress I think. It’s a hybrid one and when I got it I found the soft edge made it harder to get myself sitting up in bed

I used to have a memory foam mattress but I had to get rid of it as it massively aggravated my shoulder. The first thing I had to do when I got up was put on my shoulder brace. After lots of deliberation I ended up getting a medium mattress from warren evans, having always assumed firm was best, and it's helped a lot. It's so comfortable.

Some more flowers for you @FagsMagsandBags This is the orchid that's just bloomed again.

That's so pretty, @VictorianBigot . Also, the same as the small one I brought for myself. Everything is very pretty this morning and I'm in the process of putting on a pretty face to head out to therapy. Not because I need to do a face, but it's fun 😊

I feel like I've had a mad busy day when I really haven't at all I've just had to talk to people! I had my therapy session - face to face - which was lovely if teary for both of us, then I got home and one of the GPs from my surgery dropped by to see how I was doing. Before that I'd called the hospice because I needed them to call the pharmacy to push them along to deliver fresh meds. The hospice people are more used to my whisper voice, so I thought I'd go through them, but the first woman I was speaking to had hearing difficulties and it was all a bit of a palavar! But, it got sorted and I now have my drugs and all is well with the world. Words for the rest of the night will be of the typed variety and thank goodness for the internet and text type stuff for all of that!

It's also been a lovely day in terms of sunshine and getting to wear my varifocal sunglasses for the first time!

I think I told you all about Snoop going to Spain for a few days and not remembering the Alhambra. Turns out she's staying in the village we stayed in before and she has no recollection of it. I told her I might as well tell her we'd had a day out in Gilbratar as well as she's shorn to have no memory of that either. She doesn't. I'm going to learn to draw a rather pretty goldfish and make a goldfish card for her birthday later next month. It's nice for her though because she gets to do this all over again with no memory of having already done it. The village they're staying does great seafood, especially whitebait and now I really fancy some whitebait. There's a fish restuarant near the pier here that does half decent whitebait so I might get a cab there tomorrow and treat myself to some.

Glad you had a good(ish) day @FagsMagsandBags and YES EAT THE WHITEBAIT

Also: around our area, the magnolia seems to be particularly early this year. Ours has blossomed before our ornamental cherry, first time we've seen this. Here it is, first thing this morning.