How does a people pleaser poliely say to someone "no you cannot bring your dog to my house" ??

[Redsettee]

Just that. I've been begrudgingly agreeing to it for some time now. Now I've had enough. It causes arguments with DH too.

We don't have a dog. But we have several cats.

Next time you are around please leave Fido at home, it disturbs the cats to have him in.

More context is needed!
Is this person staying over for several nights with their dog?
Are they coming for a meal?
Are they coming for a brief catch up/cup of tea?

Suggest meeting at a mutual place instead?

'Sorry Tracy, doggy/scruffy/Bob is so lovely, but he/she is really scaring my cats, so I'd prefer you don't bring them to the house again. We could meet at X if you want to bring him along, otherwise, you'd be welcome at the house without him/her.'

I just always say no because I have cats.
”Sorry the dog can’t come as my cats get very upset/stressed. We can’t have another animal in their home”

Yeah my cat gets stress cystitis so we can't have dogs in our home because it causes her pain and she ends up peeing all over the house.

Tell them the cats are displaying stressed behaviour and it's not fair on them.

This should be really easy OP, you've got cats! Just say that after the dog last visited one of your cats showed signs of stress and weed on the carpet, so sadly you're going to have to become a no dog household.

I don't dislike dogs but I definitely don't want one in my house, and to be honest I'd be pretty annoyed if DH kept allowing a friend to bring his dog into our home.

I sympathise with the people pleasing. I would say "Jane, when you come over, you know I have the cats- what were you planning on doing with your dog?"

People will give you very direct replies to give, but you won't do it if you're a people pleaser (I talk from bitter experience)

If you say the above. She's going to get the message. Most people would.

I know you have cats but you don't need to 'have cats', in no is reason enough

Not saying on this thread but there seems to be a pattern on here where people feel they need to give reasons for saying no

Can you leave Rover at home this week? Thanks ever so much. See you Wednesday. Xx

Honesty is the best policy. I don't want you to bring your dog next time should do it. You can of course counter any concern for fidos well being with concern for your cats well being. They can decide not to come or offer an alternative like a walk with Fido instead of coming to your house.

It will be harder now, after you have allowed it, so include the acknowledgement of the change in your statement - we've tried it, but it unfortunately doesn't work for us.

“Hi x, looking forward to seeing you on xday! Unfortunately we’ve noticed our cats are very unsettled afterwards when you bring your dog, so regrettably we are going to have to ask you not to bring him along any more. Hope that’s ok.”