Perimenopause - Really worried about my Partner

[Salzgal]

Hello,
My partner has 'kind of' been diagnosed with perimenopause at 39 (GP -UK- was resistant but has referred her to HRT clinic).

I'm really worried though as the symptoms are becoming distressing. Once a month, around the period time she will becoming incredibly fatigued. Sleeping almost 18 hours a day. She can function for at most 3 hours. But then she behaves in a way as if she were drunk. Slurred speech, seems to have aphasia, motor skills really slow down and almost collapsing or falling down the stairs. When these episodes happen it's as if she is drunk or coming out of astheisa. She can also be really emotional and randomly cry and then kind of go playfrul and try and bite me (sounds very odd)

It's very distressing. Does this actually sound like Perimenopause? I'm really thinking it could be something neurological. (She can also have crazy migraines and appetite issues).
Really desperate for some insight or advice.

What about those symptoms made you/DP/the GP think perimenopause?

The slurred speech doesn’t sound like any peri symptoms I have heard of. The awful tiredness and rage does though. It’s horrible. I hope she gets seen quickly.

That does not really sound like peri. Can you go with her to the dr? If someone is having symptoms like that they may need someone advocating for them . Appreciate it is difficult . Definitely get more advice

I don't know. I think my partner was the one pushing it. The issue is that she is okay for a few hours in the morning and despite how I express my concern she doesn't really hear it. It's becoming very hard for me in the moments when this happens.

I will defintely try!

It could be diabetes, depression or insomnia? I assume she's had lots of blood tests?

Yes, from my memory her B12 is low and she's anemia. Her CRP was also slightly raised which apparently inline with peri?

That doesn't sound like peri menopause to me.

Blood tests are not the first line of diagnosis for peri.

CRP is an infection marker and anaemia may be causing the dizziness type symptoms (I am not a doctor)

What did the GP suggest apart from an HRT clinic referral?

Unfortunately, from what I am aware, nothing. She has been waiting over 6 months for the HRT. The only time in the last 6 months this didn't happen was last month when I got her to trial the carnivore diet and eating alot of fat and protein (red meat). I don't know if that's related.

I have symptoms like that and I have a neurological illness. Peri doesn’t sound like the most obvious fit here.

Do you have a strong reason to rule out alcohol/another substance?

I'm sorry to hear that. Could you give a few more details, or what may help you if you have an episode?/lifestyle choices.

Yes, there is no way. We work from home and due to the size of the place it would be too obvious. I didn't think at first (maybe 8-9 months ago) surely she is secretly drinking as it's all I can compare the symptoms to...

Just adding my voice to those saying it doesn't sound like peri at ALL.

She has been waiting over 6 months for the HRT

I still don't understand why either of you think it is peri

I don't. She has been told by the GP it is most likely that. From what I've been told.

How low is the b12? Is it being treated?

Low b12 can cause neurological issues

I'm not sure. She doesn't share this in detail with me. My feeling is what is happening is related to the b12, which is why when she was carnivore last month and ate red meat each day this didn't happen.

I took this from your OP to mean that the GP was resistant to diagnose peri - do you mean your partner was resistant?

GP -UK- was resistant but has referred her to HRT clinic

Yes sorry. My poor phrasing.

As my partner tells it, my partner pushed the peri and the GP was resistant. But based on the bloods (I assume) and after a second visit and my partner describing the symptoms the GP referred her.

Ok, well slurred speech and motor control failing is indicative of something going on with the brain. I have a neurological illness and when I have done too much and overloaded my brain this is how I go. I would be concerned about actual physical brain issues like brain tumor, and she should probably also get checked out for MS or similar.

OP I’m also 39 and currently being cared for at a menopause clinic for perimenopause. I decided to go private for this.

I have all these symptoms. I can be reading my DS a bedtime story and completely slur my words like I’m drunk & the brain fog is insane. I could sleep for days.

You mentioned her bloods have shown some other issues (B12 etc) & I had all of that ruled out before seeking HRT. My iron, B12, thyroid etc was also perfect. So definitely encourage your partner to treat those things as a first port of call. BTW eating carnivore for a few weeks won’t increase B12 enough to make a difference. It takes months and a high dosage. Any chance is likely to be hormonal fluctuations settling down.

But just to offer reassurance that perimenopause absolutely can be this awful.

The go doesn’t have to refer her to a clinic- they can simply prescribe themselves.
pernicious anemia certainly has neurological consequences and produces extreme fatigue. She needs to be asking for a b12 shot- this is often a lifelong condition.