Long story short. My husband collapsed suddenly a few years ago in the house. I found him. He was dying. Exhibiting agonal breathing, if anyone knows what that is. Basically not genuine breathing, but an automatic response of a dying brain. Because of the way he fell he was wedged tight in the room I found him, and I couldn't move him. So in a panic I sent my daughter to fetch a male neighbour to help me try and move him. He couldn't help either. The paramedics got him moved when they arrived. They tried everything but he was already gone. Hugely traumatic for us all. Neighbour is now off work sick, fairly long term but recent with anxiety and depression, partly due to what happened, other circumstances too. Neighbour told me this, and told me work therapist told him to tell people, including me. Of course I apologised, and feel dreadful about it. I perhaps should not have asked for help. I'm quite distressed and a bit angry with the therapist because would they not understand the further burden that puts on me being told that like that? I understand too that that is a selfish thought on my part, but it just feels like another level of guilt and worry to carry along with my grief. I'm struggling already, and this has added to it.