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Would you feel uncomfortable re this - school/bullying

3 replies

oatflat22 · 16/03/2025 00:27

Last year my DC was quite badly bullied by a boy in his class, very sneaky, nasty piece of work, lots of psychological stuff, divide and conquer, getting other socially immature children to do things to make them look stupid and get into trouble, saw things ourselves on several occasions at playdates and birthday parties.

when asked DC what this person was like at school we just got fine/don't want to talk about it. And at the end of the summer holidays DC finally opened the floodgates and told us what had been going on.

They've been doing things of a similar ilk to a couple of others as well I've since found out. And it turns out one of the others DC spoke about this original boy had been threatening him and saying if you don't run away from Oats child/steal oats child's coat etc. we're going to do XYZ to you. This fits in with stuff we've seen in at parties.

School were really good and asked us to give them a month. We spoke to deputy head and DC in October and it seemed things were much better and seem to have carried on that way. I've always suspected this isn't actually a case of them having done anything practical too much (but I do know that child is not daft and knows when he's been watched, so maybe this was enough) more a case of DC deftly avoiding him. We heard nothing from his actual class teacher only the deputy head (class teacher obviously new at the start of this academic yr) and when we tried to talk about it at the parents evening in Nov she changed the subject, we weren't overly concerned as I said it seemed to have settled and just thought she was running out of time.

Things seem to have started up again and I was upset talking to another group of friends tonight and said i was going to try speaking to class teacher on Mon. One of the friends messaged me and said might be best to just go straight to head again as to warn me that this teacher is friendly with the parent.

This parent is the worst (older child is a bully too) but she never pulls them up, they're always fighting with each other if they can't find someone else to pick on. I seen them draw blood on two occasions yet she posts these constant sickly posts on social media about how amazing and wonderful they are - unfollowed ages ago, however the friend tonight said to just go look at her Instagram account. the class teacher has liked everyone one of these sickly posts. About the kids.

This has made me feel really uncomfortable. How can I trust that my child is getting treated fairly and not being left to be bullied if this teacher and parent are pals and she clearly loves the kids!!! It's every single post. It's really made me question the changing of the subject at the last parents evening now!

OP posts:
SherlockHomies · 16/03/2025 00:55

Sorry but if I was speaking to a teacher about my child being bullied and they changed the subject, I would've changed it straight back again.

But yes, go to the HT again.

You don't mention the children's ages? Not that it makes a difference but I'm curious?

oatflat22 · 16/03/2025 08:43

@SherlockHomies I think we thought she was just rushing as it was coming to the end of the time slot.

Yes will go straight to Deputy Head again, just worried that the class teacher will not be objectively managing this day to day if she is friends with the other child's parents.

OP posts:
oatflat22 · 16/03/2025 08:45

Oh and they are 7/8 years - year 3

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