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Original poster

Muslim tradesman - Ramadan

30 replies

NattyFish · 15/03/2025 20:46

We have a young chap doing some external work to our house. When he arrived we offered him a cup of tea and some chocolate biscuits but he's fasting for Ramadan! He worked so hard from 8am to 6pm and didn't even have a drink of water. I felt very guilty. We ended up giving him a packet of biscuits to take home and eat when he could.

Is there another way to show hospitality to him without offering food and drink? I can't help but feel guilty watching him work, even though I know what he's doing is important for him.

OP posts:
FortyElephants · 15/03/2025 20:48

Don't feel guilty, he's happy to be fasting and he's quite used to working while fasted. I doubt he will eat a packet of biscuits but it's a nice offer. You don't have to offer anything else to him, it's not expected.

GoodVibesHere · 15/03/2025 20:51

He has chosen to do it. I mean it's absolutely bonkers, but there you go. I guess it would be worse in hot weather, I'd be worried he might faint, but at least it's cold at the moment.

Hazel665 · 15/03/2025 20:52

You've been kind and respectful of it, so that's all that's needed. Our family is mixed faith Christian/Muslim and that's how we approach it.

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Diningtableornot · 15/03/2025 20:53

You can show hospitality by being polite and welcoming. He won’t want food or drink.

dialfor · 15/03/2025 20:53

Don’t waste your time feeling guilty. He is fasting for his religious reasons, entirely his own choice.

BatchCookBabe · 15/03/2025 20:54

Why on earth do you feel guilty? Confused He told you he wanted nothing.

mumofoneAlonebutokay · 15/03/2025 20:56

Maybe a cake for iftar (I hope I'm correct, please correct me if I've used the wrong terminology ❤️)

You sound kind - ramadan isn't so bad this year, I've heard, as the sun sets earlier. Would be more difficult in the summer. He's fine and is probably super focused, and focusing on being grateful and appreciative of the world.

Original poster
NattyFish · 15/03/2025 21:07

BatchCookBabe · 15/03/2025 20:54

Why on earth do you feel guilty? Confused He told you he wanted nothing.

Because employing someone to do manual labour and then not giving them so much as a glass of water just feels so strange! I know logically I've got nothing to feel guilty about but still, it's how it makes me feel. But fully respect his religious practice of course and the last thing I'd want to do would be to make him feel awkward by offering when he's said no.

OP posts:
Original poster
NattyFish · 15/03/2025 21:08

GoodVibesHere · 15/03/2025 20:51

He has chosen to do it. I mean it's absolutely bonkers, but there you go. I guess it would be worse in hot weather, I'd be worried he might faint, but at least it's cold at the moment.

Thank you. He's working up a ladder too so that did cross my mind. Funnily enough I do intermittent fasting so know your body gets used to lack of food very quickly, but water is another matter.

OP posts:
ScarlettOYara · 15/03/2025 21:11

I've no idea why you feel guilty? Ramadan is a positive thing, he's engaging in an important religious event. Say "Ramadan Mubarak" to him and let him get on with his work.

Jollyjoy · 15/03/2025 21:17

If you want to make a gesture other than the biscuits, you could give him some healthy and nourishing food that he can take to break his fast with later. It’s amazing that he works so hard and fasts like that, the discipline must be wonderful for the mind. You sound kind.

FortyElephants · 15/03/2025 21:20

Non Muslims often have the impression that Ramadan is a punishing time that people do under sufferance. Muslims love Ramadan! They look forward to it. There's no need to feel bad about people who are fasting, or to worry unduly about their health. Professional athletes compete during Ramadan! They know what they are doing. And they are allowed to break their fast if they become ill, or otherwise unable to fast, and make it up later in the year.

minnienono · 15/03/2025 21:21

In second sending homemade cake or biscuits for iftar one day if he’s with you next week. It’s a gesture of appreciation and extends to their loved ones

WonkyDonkeyWonkeyDonkey · 15/03/2025 21:22

He will have food in his house, you don’t need to worry about providing anything for him to break his fast with.

Livelovebehappy · 15/03/2025 21:27

His choice. He’s a tradesman doing a job/providing a service. He’s not your friend, you’re not his. Don’t over invest yourself and just let him get on with his job, say thank you, pay him, goodbye……

JustMyView13 · 15/03/2025 21:34

Ramadan is an extremely important time for Muslims. He will be appreciative that you offered him snacks / drink on day one, but now that he’s explained he’s fasting it would be the most supportive to respect that and not offer again. He can break his fast for illness, so if he finds himself feeling unwell his requirements may change. Perhaps the offer that if he needs to break his fast at any time, for any reason whilst he’s at yours, just let you know and you have halal snacks & refreshments on hand always, but you won’t offer again even though that’s what’s normal for you. The kindness of offer will be enough, I’m sure.

AlternativeView · 15/03/2025 21:49

Is it a choice? ;

Can Muslims not do it if they choose??

I' work with some Muslims and they complain about it abd dread it?
The ones I've heard it doesn't sound like l a choice at all, others yes seem to be up for the challenge and enjoy abstaining to getting themselves back on track

321user123 · 15/03/2025 21:51

As a Muslim I’d say that he’s used to it and is probably taking it easy for his body if needed.

We had Ramadan’s that were almost 20yrs of fasting, so this year is almost nothing.

Not drinking is not as hard as many people think.

if you want to do something nice as a “tip” you could get a small box of Medjoul dates when doing your food shop and offer that for Iftar. That is going very out of your way and absolutely not needed, but since you’ve said you feel guilty (albeit… there’s absolutely no reason for it!) I thought of a small gesture which he’d appreciate and make you feel better. ☺️

SemperIdem · 15/03/2025 21:57

You don’t need to feel guilty. Fasting in this context isn’t a punishment.

I’ve previously worked in very diverse teams and my Muslim peers have always been proud to be able to take part in the fasting for Ramadan. I remember an older colleague being very upset one year because her health didn’t allow for it and was not likely to going forward.

LaPetitePouleRousse · 15/03/2025 21:58

When we had a mixed pair of trades over Ramadan last year, I just left out food and drink to be taken at will, and the non-Muslim guy ate his, and the Muslim guy took his home for Iftar.

Pigriver · 15/03/2025 22:07

Although fasting for Ramadan is an important part of the faith it is always a choice. The elderly, sick, children, pregnant, breastfeeding and menstruating women are not expected to fast.
If a fast is begrudged or complained about it doesn't count. It needs to be entered into willingly. The time of Ramadan is one of reflection and contemplation on ones lifestyle so no bitching or moaning or gossiping etc.

Your tradesman will be fine and happy to fast. If he feels unwell or unsafe working he will be 'allowed' to eat and drink as needed. Just be respectful and don't go full Mrs Doyle with offering his a cup of tea!

ItGhoul · 15/03/2025 22:17

I’ve had the same situation with a Muslim tradesman a few years ago. He was working in our house for four or five days during Ramadan. When he explained he was fasting I didn’t offer him anything but at the end of each day I gave him something to take home for iftar. He also brought us a massive box of incredible homemade samosas as a present one day.

SonK · 15/03/2025 22:19

Hi Muslim here who is currently fasting!

Please don't feel guilty at all, we fast for the health benefits and also the good it provides the soul.
For instance fasting during work even if it's a labour intensive job really helps us appreciate those less fortunate than us who do not eat in such conditions due to lack of food etc.

Also, I see another poster mentioned that the biscuits you provided won't even be eaten - actually that was very sweet of you, he will definitely nibble on them with a cup of tea with his family after they break their fast : )

ScarlettOYara · 15/03/2025 22:25

SonK · 15/03/2025 22:19

Hi Muslim here who is currently fasting!

Please don't feel guilty at all, we fast for the health benefits and also the good it provides the soul.
For instance fasting during work even if it's a labour intensive job really helps us appreciate those less fortunate than us who do not eat in such conditions due to lack of food etc.

Also, I see another poster mentioned that the biscuits you provided won't even be eaten - actually that was very sweet of you, he will definitely nibble on them with a cup of tea with his family after they break their fast : )

Ramadan Mubarak!

SherlockHomies · 15/03/2025 22:26

This reminds me of my lovely Irish aunt years ago.

She had some Muslim men doing some work in her garden and it was a very hot Summer and they were fasting.

Like a lot of older Irish women of her time she was a proper 'feeder' and couldn't stand the thought of them not eating or drinking.

After the 5th time she offered them drinks and ice lollies which they kept refusing, I said "Auntie please stop badgering them, they CAN'T HAVE THEM!"

She turned to them and with genuine love said, "Ok well I've left a couple of bottles of water down the side of the shed where no-one will see you taking a sip".

One of the lads whispered in my ear, "Your Auntie is right, Allah can't see down the side of that shed, the gap's too narrow" 🤣🤣