The older I get, the more I realise …….

[Kittenswhiskers]

Some people are not worth it, stick up for yourself like you’re someone you love, the things in life that cost nothing are worth the most, stop worrying about what is not in your control, treasure the people that are good to you
focus on the good
believe in yourself
trust in yourself

feel free add any insights that have become more apparent to you as you’ve got older

Nobody's opinion of you matters in the grand scheme of things. If you're happy with something then accept that, don't let others opinions get in your head

That’s so true
kinda all goes back to the original saying
don’t let the bastards grind you down
that actually covers a lot

Let them be is the best thing I find as I get older. I can’t control other people’s actions or opinions only my own. As long as I’m happy that I’ve done my best at that moment taking circumstances, responsibilities and my own needs into account then I can do no more and trying to do everything for everyone can only lead to unhappiness and there will still be someone who tells you it’s not enough

Yes I agree there’s always a few arseholes that no matter what you do, it’s not enough
so bollocks to them

People just need to live and let live it’s actually that simple

That society is going backwards, and I don't need to join in.

Agree

Apart from family or very close friends, people forget about you pretty quickly. We are all tied up with ourselves and having been involved in various groups, when I have left, it has seemed no loss to them, even if I was a key or leading member.

Therefore the people to cherish are family, friends who really mean something and pets.

It is so important to be your own best friend with interests and passions to make your life meaningful.
.

Life is mostly grey - there's very little that is black or white
You can only change yourself, so focus on that, and let everyone else be themselves. Make decisions about their place in your life accordingly

I agree with all of this. I spent far too many years being a people pleaser and have now (way too late) changed. I'm not rude and unpleasant and I wouldn't want to be, but I realise how we are all just ships that pass in the night really. I don't get invested in people like I used to. Some of the best things in life are free that's true, but I've also realised far too late that money is very, very important - it gives you autonomy as well as security.

That my Mum is selfish, self-centred and actively dislikes me

Pick your battles. Don't sweat the small stuff. Let stuff go.

Learning not to argue and bicker over things that, in the grand scheme of things, are pointless. All it does is create stress, bad atmospheres and negativity.

Don't bear grudges and try to see things from the point of view of others and realise that not everyone thinks and feels the same way as I do about stuff. What might be trivial to me, may be a big deal to someone else, and that is okay.

Your health matters more than any material asset you could have.

This too shall pass - even if it seems massive at the time

People aren’t judging you or even thinking about you nearly as much as you might worry they are

Don’t worry about things you can’t do anything about

Get out of your comfort zone - keep trying new hobbies, skills, friends etc - or your life will get smaller

Live your life to please yourself not others