How do you stop obsessing over retirement? 🤣

[AssCeiling]

Weird question I know!

I'm about 8 -9 years away from retiring. I'm really looking forward to it.

But I'm also getting a bit "obsessive".

Maybe that's not the right word but every day I find myself thinking about how life will be different when I'm retired. Like I'm sat here now readying myself for work thinking "Imagine what today would be like if I didn't have work. What would I do?"

I don't hate my job at all. I'm not looking to leave or change my hours. I might go PT as I approach retirement age but not yet.

I love my life currently and I really don't want to wish my life away (though I don't think that's what I'm doing). I know it's a really weird question but how can I retrain myself to stop focusing on retirement so much?

Thanks!

Can't answer your question but i am exactly the same. Been Nursing for 30 years this year and am planning to go at 57 all being well so I have 9 years left. I know time will fly by and I don't want to wish my life away but I can't imagine the sheer thrill of waking up and not ever having to worry about the stress of work again!

I’m with you, and <5yrs out. For me it’s obsessing over money.. ‘don’t spend as that will increase your pension pot and you might need it later’. I normally love my job but the past few years have been hard and so the thought of retirement is enticing. I don’t want to be wishing my life away, but I reacalculate pensions several times a week !

I think about it a lot and I'm 36.

I was also lucky enough to never hate any of my jobs I also felt this way but from very young. So many of my plans with finances took this in to consideration and I did retire in my early 50’s, now I’m late 50’s. Have done the voluntary work I wanted to be able to do but just would never have paid me enough as an actual job. Have been waiting for DH to retire so have just had regular holidays but now actually moving forward with our plans of travelling. We will do 2 to 3 month chunks a couple of times a year for a few years.

What you need to obsess over is money so you can do it. We still holidayed overseas every year.

Me too and I'm 38.

Although I don't have any sort of retirement fund in place just yet. That's my next goal.

Also not helpful in terms of answering your question but I am way too interested in this. My husband effectively retired 6 months ago which doesn't help! It is easier though to envisage day to day life post retirement as a result.

I am saving a lot but also trying to make sure I do the things I want to do which aren't so expensive.

My husband and I talk about it daily at least once and we are late 30s/early 40s. We are both high earners in fairly unpleasant jobs with a lot of travel, stress, and extra hours, and it makes it a little less crap to imagine what's coming.

9 years is a very long time, anything can get in the way of your plans.

I would be spending my time making sure i have the maximum amount to retire on, thats what i did.

I've been nursing 35 years, love my job but definitely think about retiring a lot. I'm knackered.

I think it’s relatively normal, isn’t it?

Let’s face it, a comfortable retirement is the equivalent of a medium/large sized lottery win, and I think a lot of people daydream about that.

I'm 55 so have 13 years left. I won't be able to pay rent or bills probably so it weights on my mind most days.

Me too.
I'm 57. I am having an endless debate with myself. I reckon I could go at 62. As long as I keep saving and get DD3 through uni.
I have enough final salary pension to see me right from 67. It's just funding those 5 years.

Retirement is lovely. The only thing I would say is that it's weird suddenly having no structure to your week, compared to the structure of work. We've found it actually helps to have a little bit of structure and regularity, it kind of scaffolds the week. For us this is my husband's volunteering twice a week, when I accompany him into the city for breakfast and then shopping. Spring, summer and autumn are great because I'm a passionate gardener, winter I do find a bit of a challenge.

Obviously the boring stuff like house and car maintenance still continue! I do count myself so fortunate that I can see both of my grandchildren regularly, which I couldn't do if I was still at work. I would agree with the poster who says about not wishing your time away!!!!

47 and find myself thinking about this a lot. Maybe more just planning the financial side of things.
I dont want to wish my life away though, but I am planning to retire by 60, earlier if possible.
I think it's good to plan, but not good to obsess over

I think it’s natural to look forward to being free from obligation. I can’t imagine how to avoid fantasising about it!

@Mellivora What you need to obsess over is money so you can do it. We still holidayed overseas every year.

Oh obsessing over the money is definitely part of the overall obsession.
I have many, many spreadsheets, projects and models 😂

Guess it’s just about the mindset, lucky enough to have worked in a job that allowed retirement from it at 55, always planned to go then but never thought actively about it until the last year and that was largely down to the pre retirement course that we were encouraged to attend

Is your Final Salary not paying at 65? ( or 60? )
State Pension kicks in at 67 for me. But you can defer it year by year which increases the monthly amount when you do claim it.

OP, as @jasflowers suggests, look into how you can increase the pension pot before you retire.

Plus, if you have ‘liquid assets’ be they premium bonds , company shares, cash and/or shares ISAs and savings and current accounts, you have the option to live off them but leave your pension pot(s) growing over time.

I'm nearly 61. Fully intended to drop to part-time at 60, but the unexpected loss of a colleague left the team a bit in the lurch and me dropping hours as well would have made life well neigh impossible for everyone (me included, I would probably have ended up doing a lot of unpaid work on my 'days off' just to stay afloat). I'm definitely going to do it this year though - I'm in education so will go to the end of the semester before I drop hours.
My pension will make up for the drop in salary, but I'll have to keep working part-time until state pension kicks in for me at 67, I've got a DS who doesn't start uni until September, so the cash needs to keep rolling in for a few years yet.
I'm really looking forward to having some 'me time' at last, and yes I do daydream about it quite a lot.
But on the other hand, I work in HE and the sector's in chaos with redundancies left right and centre. I've also started to panic about what happens if I'm not given the option to carry on until 67 - things would be impossibly tight without my part-time income.

No idea. We’re ready to go! Have our flat already but haven’t been able to sell the family home yet.
We used to visit the flat regularly and that helped but my husband has been seriously ill for some time, recovering from surgery atm and we can’t even do that.
He really struggles with the stairs and we desperately need to go. Just have to try to be sanguine. It’ll happen eventually.

I turned 60 this year. Dont wish your life away. You don’t know what retirement will look like. There could be bereavement, divorce, illness etc etc. enjoy life now.
60, I can see 20 years of good healthy travel. That’s depressing. I wish I was 35 again.

I'm 50 and very rarely think about it other than with a vague sense of trepidation - I love (and need) the structure and sense of purpose that my job gives me. Fantasising about retirement in your 30s seems mad! Careful not to wish your one precious life away.

I was lucky enough to be able to retire early after several decades working in a high pressure environment. It is indeed wonderful. Some thoughts with hindsight:

You are doing the right thing with your financial planning. But you do need to enjoy life before then too. How about shifting some of the energy you're spending on your 'retirement obsession' into what you can do to enrich your life now? I found it too easy to fall on the sofa of an evening and not do very much, and some weekends would come and go too without doing anything special. We did some of the time obviously but we could have done more. I appreciate time and energy are at a premium when you are working but I found once we got out and we're doing things, I'd find tbe energy and would still manage to squeeze in tbe necessary boring things that needed doing.
Maybe start thinking of hobbies/activities you'd like to take up when you retire and see if there is some way of getting going on those now, even though you don't have as much time.

Don't wish away the next few years!

I don't obsess about retirement (I'm 40 with 2 small kids so retirement isn't really on my radar) but I do have a tendency to massively hype up future events that I am looking forward to. It's not great because it stops you from enjoying the present, it also tends to lead to a bit of a an anti-climax when you finally get to do the thing / make the change etc. I have no good advice I am afraid but I can definitely see how it could happen.

You have to get there first. My FIL died from cancer six months before he was due to retire, so all MIL retirement plans went out of the window in grief.

You never know what's around the corner so I don't even think about it. To me, if you get there, it's just a transition from being time poor and money rich to time rich and money poor.