Can't tell if I'm looking for sympathy or a head wobble but keen to get other views. Feeling quite low about some of my friendships.
I've been part of the same wider group of friends since university, 10 of us all live up and down the country. We only usually all get together at weddings and manage one weekend away a year. As with any big friendship groups, there are smaller closer friendships. I have two close friends Elizabeth and Sophie. Sophie and I message daily. We used to live together and spent covid in a bubble together. The three of us have done things together like holidays and theatre trips as we have similar interests.
Now Elizabeth and Sophie are also close with Jane and Holly. I get on with Jane and Holly but not very close. Just saw on social media that the 4 of them had a weekend away together and just felt really rubbish. All of us were together last weekend at a wedding they didn't mention it? The four of them went abroad a few years ago and Sophie avoided telling me but was overly nice when she got back. There's definitely a secretive element there and they have their own WhatsApp group etc.
Also I caught up recently with Elizabeth and a few of the others in the group for lunch but that was because we lived within an hour radius, which some of the others wouldn't have travelled for. So I suppose that could be perceived as something similar?
I feel really silly for being so sensitive to this? I'm 31?
I had a few friendship struggles when I was younger and left out but I do know I have good friends from school, university, work, life that I should be grateful for. However a bit of me always feels like the person on the edge. Jane and Holly both have close family relationships and a wide group of close school friends too, which I don't have and feels unfair. I suppose there is some jealousy there I need to address.