lifelong close friend.
a few years ago she divorced and now has custody of her son aged 15 and daughter aged 10.
she works in media. very successful career. she lives a fashionable lifestyle full of parties, travel, glamorous events.
her son is a lovely, sociable, funny, charismatic boy. she adores him and treats him like an adult best friend. she allows his gf to sleepover and has since early year 9. she allows him to have house parties and buys alcohol for those parties. after one party she found drugs in the house and said with no anger “silly boys” then did little else except tell them how to be safe when high. she takes him to festivals and parties with large groups of his friends and lets them run free with no supervision.
her son and my son were offered weed. they said no. he told my son that he hates the stuff but never to tell his mum he turned it down as she would be shocked about him being so square.
he told my son he never sees his mum alone, they always have friends round, or go to parties and he misses that.
he idolises his mum. he is so proud of her career and her fashion sense and her large circle of glam friends so it’s not that he isn’t close to her. but I feel she needs to know that he’s literally forcing himself to live a fast paced party lifestyle to impress her and he misses quiet family time. at the same time he is struggling academically maybe because he’s living the life of an 18 year old gap year student.
her daughter is largely not mentioned, not included in stuff due to her age, left with babysitters during all these parties and festivals she takes her son to. her daughter is very studious and not sociable and I am not sure my friend clicks with her and this is really obvious when I’m with them for a long period.
should I talk to her about this? nobody else will as she has no extended family and no real contact with her ex. I’m probably the most steady presence in her life. she is a lovely well intentioned person who I think might reflect if told all this. but I do accept it’s not really any of my business.