Teen diagnosed with ADHD. Help me help him!

[Mwydryn]

My son is in Y10 and has just been privately assessed and diagnosed with ADHD. His lack of ability to concentrate and his memory issues were flagged as being very very bad indeed. He's a very laid-back, generally happy, chilled young man who is well-liked by teachers and peers, and he isn't at all disruptive or distracting in class. He is quite quirky, and I expected him to be diagnosed with ASD also, and was assessed. They saw no signs of ASD.

I have a meeting with the school soon, and they will put in place extra time for exams etc. But I don't know about things like medication. I have read a lot online and have ordered some books, but I don't know any other parents with teens with ADHD, especially the way it presents in DS. DS' father not in the picture either so I'm trying to navigate this alone.

Any advice or wisdom shared would be appreciated!

Hey there,
best of luck with this, he is lucky to have an engaged parent to help him through this.
If you are open to nutritional therapies, take a look at Georgia Ede's book or talks (x), and also Metabolic Mind, the discussion on there with Ally Huston might be interesting for you (b).

Wish you and your family all the best.

Thanks so much sajacas - I'll have a look at those videos. I have been thinking about nutrition for him, especially knowing how food definitely affects my own levels of concentration. At the same time, I'm trying not to project too much of who I am/what affects me onto him, because I know now that our brains are wired differently. I have a great deal to learn!

This was recommended to us by DD's therapist:
https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-newsletters/

She sees her mainly because of her ASD but they also work on ADHD management. We found the money well spend for her sessions. It works especially good as she is more open to listen to her than to us parents.

Do check if there are any support groups in your area, especially for parents to exchange knowledge.

I'm sorry I have no advice as we're about to start looking into diagnosis and support for DS - who sounds really like your boy x

Can I ask who you went to for the assessment process as I'm just looking into this now - need one that would be 'accepted' by school, Drs etc.

Whereabouts are you @Griffyn? If in the south east we're using one that's also used by my school and others in the area.

Thank you for responding but I'm up north x

My son was diagnosed in yr10 last year and also has ASD diagnosis. He has never been disruptive at school but really struggled to focus and stay on task. We went down the medication route and it has been a game changer. He can concentrate much better and is also much calmer at home.

Can I ask how you went about this? I made sure that the private diagnosis was one accepted by NHS and school, and am not sure if I just go to the GP and ask now! And how has life changed for you DC on medication? Sorry for all the questions!

I was recommended one when I found the autism educational support at the council, but also I had a friend who had her child diagnosed about a year before mine. I wasn't sure if I wanted a diagnosis tbh- I really don't want him to think there's anything "wrong" with him, and also the ADHD posts on Insta/TikTok are mostly neurotypical people who think that the fact they are procrastinators and are scatty means they have ADHD. Those posts didn't really resonate with him.
But I'm so glad we went for it. It's helped both of us to try and approach things differently, and not look for neurotypical answers to neurodivergent minds. I am so new to this but I can see already that it's really worth getting assessed.

He was initially prescribed methylphenidate via the private service that diagnosed him. Once he was titrated up to a dose they felt worked for him (took about 4 months) they did a shared care agreement with our GP.
He now finds it easier to concentrate and his teachers say he is better at staying focused on what he is doing. Previously he would get distracted or just find it hard to actually get started with work. At home he used to be restless and would prowl around starting arguments. He still talks a lot though!