How do nursery waitlists work and how much do they move

[Winter2028]

We have a full time place at a nursery near work (chose it as it is bilingual) but we decided that the commute might be more manageable if it was 3 days a week. Currently 18 weeks pregnant. We decided to sign up for 2 days at a local religious nursery (where we would have to swifch synagogue in order to get priority on the waitlist). Dh actually joined a new synagogue today to give ourselves a better chance. I belong to another synagogue but not their affiliated synagogue.

Previously when I viewed the nursery I was told there was no waitlist (though that was in November when foetus was barely 5 weeks old!) But there is a waitlist now though I am registering a year in advance. I range from position 2 to position 7. It's probably hormones but I can't help but feel like I failed my baby a bit cos now I think about it, I think this nursery really is what I want, it was just the first one I viewed so I didn't make a decision there and then...

We are in London.

Nurseries can determine their own criteria. School nurseries may use distance for example but start at 2+. Likely in your case faith and siblings are applied but it may not be as transparent as that and even enrolling early may not guarantee a place. Suggest you go on several lists in case nothing is forthcoming by the time you need it.

It's daycare for babies. Starting 6 months. Interestingly for this nursery, siblings lower than faith even those from unaffiliated synagogues.

I do admissions at a private nursery in London - honestly it’s so oversubscribed - I fill the places for September basically the September before with a load of newborns wanting to start when they are around 1 year old.

i have a time stamped list of when people apply - but tbh we don’t actively call anyone on the list - we get them to get in touch with us as and have a start day in mind and if that works for us then I take the deposit and that’s a space filled! We are always full and it doesn’t seem worth the time and effort to have any criteria- except for siblings getting priority

They can pick and chose. It’s not just based on waiting time. They’ll prioritise people who can start as close to the space becoming available as possible, for the number of days that works for them etc. We definitely lost out on places because we didn’t want a place on Fridays.

I want to start next January and they can only offer me next October. My baby is born in July.

We only have places in September /!october really when the pre school children leave for school and then the next oldest move to pre school and then it makes space for younger ones to join

Places only come up other times of year if children leave so it’s hard to predict

And for young babies spaces rely on the timeframe for moving the current cohort up to the next age-group creating a vacancy. Staff ratios will be strictly controlled. Also the proposed extension of childcare funding to babies may increase demand.

I ended up going back to work in October in order to get nursery places (babies born in Jan/Feb) when I'd have liked the year off but they could fill them in Sept/Oct for the year, they wouldn't hold Jan/Feb spaces open, it is really unfortunate timing for you. Having said that people do move house, change jobs, change childcare mid year freeing up spaces but you might not get much notice.

It can be very hit and miss. A nirsery can have a massive waiting list... but then if a few spaces open up at once, they might not have anyone who wants to fill them. For instance, people who went on the waiting list are happy with a different nursery they found, or moved and forgot to tell them. So you might find that you can get a place next week... but not book one for a year in advance.

I'm a planner, but we were let down with a spot we thought we had for DD2 and this randomness drove me nuts.

Good luck!

I hope primary schools aren't similar. It's probably the hormones but I feel like I failed my son even though he is only in utero. I heard how amazing this nursery was from many people but when I visited it wasn't the cleanest so I had some reservations.

It's worth bearing in mind that, whilst children are born every month, the majority start school the September before or in which they turn five. So every August time, there is a clear out of children from the oldest group, the next group bumps up to become the oldest group and so it continues leaving the nursery with space in the baby group. Most nurseries wouldn't like too many to start at the same time so they won't completely fill their spaces with those whose parents are going back to work in the September but those might be the parents who have priority.
Nonetheless, I wouldn't worry. London has a declining birth rate and house prices continue to climb so those looking to buy a bigger place in London may be priced out meaning those waiting list places won't be taken up. 🆙

I think they also prioritise children who want full time places. Appreciate it differs nursery to nursery but I registered when I was pregnant wanting a place for 3 days a week. A friend applied months later to start at the same time but wanting 5 days a week. She got an offer from the nursery within a few weeks even though she applied much later.

Also, could it be that they prioritise families who are a member of that specific synagogue? They may not admit it but that’s another possibility.

And you really haven’t let your child down. Not at all! You weren’t blown away by the nursery, you only became more keen after friends said it was a great nursery. I think your gut was probably telling you something that it won’t be the right setting for you.

You need to enroll in different nurseries if you need a certain day. You can always move a child if a faith based is important to you.
Ask nurseries about how lists are handled and which children go first. Often they take families filing 5 days if they can. It's different from place to place.
Good luck.

To reassure you, the process for primary schools is completely different. It’s run by the local authority, every school has a published policy and it’s all made simpler by all children starting in September and for five days a week.

While I can understand that faith is important to you, you may have to widen your search outside your current situation. Have you looked outside your faith and the one near work? Near work - unless both of you have the same route - can be a nightmare if you are ill, you still want your child to go and it's a massive difference to drop a child off 10 minutes from home than to go near work.

Schools - unless you opt for a private school - work different. While some schools do have a priority list, religion included, there is the duty of the local authority to guarantee a space.

Could you apply for multiple? So your name isn’t jusr down for one?

Yes that's why I wanted the faith one cos it's near my home for 2 days. The nursery i have secured is in the city of London and we both work in financial services.

I want my baby to go to a Jewish faith school. I live 0.5 miles from the school and the catchment varies wildly year on year 0.5 miles to 1.6 miles. My flat is very small (2 bed) nd I hope to move to a larger flat but yet if it's going to be like that I don't think I can risk it.

I don’t want to be outing because PMs aren’t working, but what part of London? In some areas there’s many childminders who who are closely tied with places of worship too.

Speaking from experience with friends, it’s not always best to have a nursery near work because if you need to WFH one day you don’t have the option as you need to travel in to drop your children to nursery and also there’s the commute in. Rush hour with a 6m old every day on the tube may be tough!

We could have opposing hybrid days. I know it's not ideal but I have a secured place there and it's a lovely nursery that speaks my language to the children. There are people who commute from Kent for that nursery. Hence I secured it very early even above the faith nursery even though faith was also important to me. But dh and I agreed at that time that objectively that nursery was better plus it qualified for more funding due to being in city of London which is a rich council with few nurseries.

But as you say logistics are not ideal.

I live in Finchley. I am liberal jewish (dh is atheist though was raised jewish) so kashrut isn't important for us. We would like our child to be raised in the faith and exposed to it but at the same time there are also other attributes that are important to us like bilingualism. Hence our dilemma. I guess initially we went for the bilingual nursery cos at that age how much jewish learning can they actually absorb while babies do pick up words. Plus I can bring baby to tiny tots service and I also plan to send to jewish school (primary or secondary) so lots of chances there. I haven't found any nursery locally I like more than the faith nursery with the waitlist

That’ll also be hard for making friends though. Particularly when slightly older as their friends will live all over London. But again I’m sure you’ve considered this. I just couldn’t handle the rush hour every day there and back with a 6 month old!

What language is it? I know the area very well and am baffled that people travel from Kent all the way to the financial district just for a particular nursery for a 6m old. Perhaps they over marketed it!

Mandarin.

Okay I know the area of London well. Yeah I wouldn’t do the northern line commute ever with a 6m old, let alone every week. But that’s me personally. I think your view of logistics will change once your child is here.