Comparison is the thief of joy

[Applesandapples8]

I’ve recently been a bit down about our finances. We have enough but not much extra, are lucky to own a home (with a high interest mortgage needing refurbs we can’t quite afford), and have a good marriage and healthy gorgeous DCs. Much to be grateful for, I know. And yet at the end of the month I’ve barely got two pence to rub together, and i do find myself worrying as the cost of living continues to increase.

A dear friend just bought his first home, we went to uni together. I chose a caring career and he ended up in tech and became (literally) a millionaire. The home is stunning, been featured on blogs and architecture/design magazines. I congratulated him as I am happy for him, he’s worked hard to get where he is. We had a long chat and he told me he was proud too but really would love to have what DH and I have (love, family, fulfillment, he describes his work as empty) and that if he could trade it all in, he would. He’s one of my oldest friends and I don’t believe he’s being disingenuous.

It was a bit of lightbulb moment for me and made me realise how lucky I am and how much I have to be grateful for. It’s hard to relieve the stress of financial pressure but still helped me see it in a different way.

Can anyone else relate? I’d love to hear stories of being reminded to be grateful for what you have.

On a pretty much daily basis, I count my blessings that DH - while he can be bloody annoying, dogmatic, impatient etc - is kind, helpful and generous and isn't a sexist arse.

My poor DM was stuck with my coercive, verbally aggressive bastard of a father until she died. He could be charming. He could be kind. That made the bastarding much harder to get your head around.

There will always be someone with more, unless you’re a billionaire, but there will be a lot more with less.

@EdithStourton thank you, yes, I feel so lucky my DH does so much for myself and the children, and treats us all with love and respect. Glad you have found the same.

@Bluevelvetsofa thank you, yes, it’s always good to reframe. Though I must admit when I think of how many billions have it worse than me, I spiral a bit into guilt and sadness for the inequities in the world 😔

Can be the richest person in the world. You still end up the same as everyone else. Might be later and in more comfort. Time and money you can prob never enough of but one is finite

You can't snuggle up warm on the sofa watching telly with a big bank balance.