Leaving London sublet early due to anxiety - bad idea?

[anxiouswoman1]

Hi all, I feel pathetic to admit this to any friends/family in real life but just needed somewhere to vent.
(I should maybe add I have autism so am prone to stress and anxiety)

I’m living in London, and my long term tenancy is not ready until 3.5 weeks time. My parents live far from London and I decided to take a short sublet instead to fill the weeks before my long term place.
I stupidly only did a virtual viewing for the sublet, and most of my decision was based on how friendly the flatmate seemed and how it looked fine on video call / pics.

I am an overly anxious and risk averse person anyway, so I thought for once I’ll take a bit of a risk and still accept this sublet as it was only short term and my friends have had no issues doing similar in the past.

I moved in to the sublet a few days ago and I’m finding it extremely hard to cope, genuinely can’t sleep and pathetically have been brought to tears. There are numerous issues with the sublet place, eg no light and no lock in bathroom (I’m sharing with a respectable guy but I’m still paranoid he may accidentally walk in), creaky wooden floors which move and have huge holes/cracks, thin walls and can hear neighbours arguing as well as slamming doors, handles falling off cabinets and doors, all skirtings and walls are covered in dirt and cobwebs, the kitchen sink constantly leaks water so the surfaces have gone all mouldy and I feel too creeped out to cook anything there.

Also, another big thing is that the area feels unsafe as in just a few days I’ve been harassed by multiple men and one guy even followed me and kept talking so I had to change my route then stall time hiding in Lidl. I would have thought I was quite street smart, and have lived in ‘deprived’ areas of East London before where occasionally would get catcalling but to this extent really shocked me.

I’ve already paid the £900 for this sublet which I know is a crazy amount of money, but thinking of booking a cheap Airbnb instead just so I can feel safe and less anxious.

I’m too ashamed to tell my parents about the stupid mistake I’ve made as I know they’ll blame me, and they are very strict (one of the reasons I thought to get a sublet to avoid staying with them).

just wondering wwyd really? Would you accept the financial blow and find an Airbnb (it’s an awful amount of money but I could still afford it as I have savings). I think I’d rather find a temporary weekend bar job to make up wasting the £900 than stay here

Go. I wouldn’t stay anywhere without a lock on the bathroom. Trust your gut. Nothing to do with anxiety. This is safety.

Trust your gut. But also - ask for some money back. The worst he can do is say no.

thank you, I was worried I was being overly sensitive due to anxiety/ASD

No. Read back your thread and think what you would advise me if I had written it. You would say go immediately and the money doesn’t matter. Trust yourself

I doubt you will find much cheaper in a safer area though

I found an Airbnb spare room in shared flat for equivalent of £40 a night in very safe part of North London (I know this area too). Still more expensive but not as bad considering area much nicer, and of course there’s the £900 loss from the original sublet

I feel awful for wasting money but I wont go into debt as I have easy access savings

The fact that you've written "3.5" weeks sounds like you are counting the days, hours and minutes before you can get out of that hellhole.

Just go. Think of it as a right of passage. I think a lot of us here have been in your position at one time or another. I certainly have.

Don't feel awful, OP, just regard this as an invaluable learning experience. Now you know that you can't tell what a place is really like to live in from a video call, and also that it isn't possible to tolerate certain things even for 3 weeks - 3 nights might have been manageable. You've done well to find the cheap AirBnB - enjoy it.

*rite of passage, I should said. Not right. We've all been there, OP.

It's not worth it. Just up sticks.

Thank you x

No, it's not pathetic at all, it sounds like an uncomfortable and unpleasant situation, totally reasonable to get out of it.