Do I deal with the depression first or the cause of it?

[infertilityivfdepression]

Been ttc for nearly 4 years now. It’s made me stressed and depressed. Now at the point where we are going to book IVF - BUT I feel so bad I’m wondering even though the reason is infertility and the solution could be IVF am I actually too unhappy and I need to deal with the depression first ?

Is it detrimental to go into such a hard invasive medical regime in a bad mental state or once I start will I feel purposeful and hopeful and that will help?

edited to add I’m 41 so time is not on my side

in your shoes I’d push ahead with the treatment while doing therapy.

This was my plan but for some reason I’ve just suddenly got this worry that I’m not ready because I’ve got so stressed but the reason for that is the infertility! Maybe it’s just nerves and I’m reading too much into it and I’ll feel better once the process is started

I wish I’d realised sooner I needed to do more but it’s been so drawn out, trying for 6 months no intervention then having initial tests, having a hycosy then seeing if that worked so another 6 months gone , then multiple cycles of ovulation induction etc etc and I feel I wasted all that time and I feel irritated at myself as now I’m so mentally and physically exhausted going into ivf. I can’t see how I can be less depressed though unless I’m doing something proactive in regards to the infertility but at the same time I’m worried how much worse I’ll feel if it’s too much to deal with or doesn’t work

Definitely push on ahead. I was in similar shoes with my headspace before IVF and I think my anxiety worsened because I knew it was our last chance at a family which heightened all emotions. If we didn't try we'd never know, whereas trying IVF we were definitely going to find out if we'd ever have a family and that was scary.

You can do this, you will get through it and it will be so worth it when you hopefully hold your baby 🤞🤞🤞