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Why do I have such an obsessive personality?

12 replies

Anonimouze · 25/02/2025 07:09

Just that really!

Im a seeming ‘normal’ person in other ways. Have a job etc. But I have this trait which means I obsess about things to the point it drives me and everyone else around me mad. It can be something good or bad. No matter what I try it whirs around my brain for what feels like forever. Sometimes months!

A good example of it is with hobbies. I tend to find something I like, become obsessed with it. Buy everything to do with it, talk about only that. I want to become the best at whatever it is I can be and just put 100% into it. Often at the expense of anything else because it’s all I can think of. Sometimes this will last a long time, other times not.

Things I want to buy is another one (bigger things not food shopping and that type of thing) I will research it and talk about it until I’m blue in the face because I can’t just make a decision. I’ve got to check it out with a fine tooth comb and know every little thing before I commit. If it was say a dress I could search for hours a day finding the ‘right’ one.

It also happens about other things. I’m currently in a stressful situation at work. I’ve not slept for weeks for thinking about it, from morning until night. Even dream about it. All day I have this sinking pit feeling anticipating it happening and feel tearful if I see the situation happening again.

Not sure I’ve explained this right but is there anything I can do to shut this off? Distract myself and just be normal?

OP posts:
Sharppencils · 25/02/2025 07:10

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Anonimouze · 25/02/2025 07:18

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I do! I manage fine with all aspects of life other than this which made me think this is a ‘me’ thing. I would love to be able to control it and just turn it off.

OP posts:
Catchafallingstar321 · 25/02/2025 07:33

I am exactly like this, your post has summed me up in a nutshell! I have started to realise I likely have ADHD and it's hyper fixation.

Sharppencils · 25/02/2025 07:35

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Anonimouze · 25/02/2025 08:03

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5,3 and 2!

Luckily the hobby of the moment is very managable around the kids but I’m just itching to escalate it!

It’s the stressful thoughts that are upsetting me though. Like a normal person has something bad happen to them and moves on but I’ve been replaying it every day for weeks, thinking about it constantly so I can’t sleep. It’s just awful!

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Sharppencils · 25/02/2025 10:30

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notatinydancer · 25/02/2025 11:07

I have this it's hyper focus. I have ADHD.

BallerinaFall · 25/02/2025 11:09

thats how my adhd presents - all or nothing, either fully immersed or fully forgotten. Not able to care/deep dive obsess over what needs to be done / can be obsessed about but rather some rather intricate strange thought that pops up and then obsess until, i dont anymore, and onto the next hyperfocus,

OriginalUsername2 · 25/02/2025 11:18

Hyper focus. It can be amazing or debilitating. I’m the same when bad things happen. It’s exhausting and embarrassing when others think you should have moved on a long time ago!

ValentinesGranny · 25/02/2025 11:38

I'll add to the chorus. DH and 2DSs have ADHD. I realised something was wrong when DS1 was a toddler. He was obsessed with makes and models of cars. It took until he was 9 to get a diagnosis. (He's now 30). The more i saw and researched, the more i realised DH was identical, just as you describe.
DC 2 was born 10 years later and was the same.
They're all lovely, hardworking and DSs both have careers in engineering where hyper focus focus is essential.
DC3 is NT. She sailed through school, all grade 8s and 9s at GCSEs and is sitting maths, Physics and Chemistry at A level. DSs struggeld (never badly behaved) until they found what they loved.

Anonimouze · 25/02/2025 12:26

Thanks everyone!

Amazing to hear it’s not just me. Is there anything you’ve found that helps with it at all?

It’s good in some ways. I’m very hard working, always on the go. But the noise in my brain is constant which sometimes can be a lot.

OP posts:
notatinydancer · 25/02/2025 14:14

Anonimouze · 25/02/2025 12:26

Thanks everyone!

Amazing to hear it’s not just me. Is there anything you’ve found that helps with it at all?

It’s good in some ways. I’m very hard working, always on the go. But the noise in my brain is constant which sometimes can be a lot.

ADHD

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