First birthday since DH left

[LouLou198]

I'm 42 today. DH left 5 months ago and filled for divorce. 2 dc at home.
Full on script etc, he is living his best life.
First birthday in 25 years without him and I feel really sad, feel like I have nothing to look forward to, hate only having dc 50% of the time, I am so used to doing everything with them. Just feel so alone and having a good cry. Anyone else been in the same situation? Will it ever get better?

You need to find your new life, don’t spend their dad’s days waiting for them to come home. Get a hobby, get out and meet People.

This is what I'm trying to do, but it still feels just as bad.

5 months isn't long so be kind to yourself. But maybe use this as a catalyst for change. Can you do something nice just for you? Buy your self something nice, even if just something small. Have a nice bath, bake a cake, watch a good film or read a book. Time to make a fuss of you!

Oh and Happy Birthday!!💐💐

@LouLou198 happy happy birthday 🎂 🎈 sorry you are feeling sad on your special day. Small steps, do something that makes you feel better. Have a good cry if it helps. It does get better x sending hugs x

So sorry to read this, happy birthday to you!! Take this opportunity today to write future goals and a bucket list of things you want to do. Could be time for your midlife glow up? New hair cut and clothes? Think about who you want to be and go for it.

Happy Birthday. I’m so sorry to hear what a tough time you have been having. I wonder if it’s a case of today’s going to be one of those days where you feel your feelings. It is all those emotions you’re feeling. 5 months is no time and although you don’t say it, it sounds as though you’ve done a great job of getting your children sorted with their new routine up in place. It comes across that you’ve been pragmatic and got on with it and now those accompanying emotions need to be felt. It’s a healthy and successful way to manage what you’ve been through and are still going through. All the best.

@JumpingGreenFrogs that's exactly how I feel. Thank you.

It’s very, very raw still OP. The “firsts” are always incredibly difficult and it’s ok to feel the way you do today. I’d even say it’s normal.

You will feel differently next year, and different again the year after that.

Be kind to yourself. Think about how you would like your life to look in a years time and make baby steps towards that x

Happy birthday OP

This is going to be a shit birthday but doesn't mean they all will. It's still raw and emotional. I've had a few of those for different reasons and birthdays are a point of reflections and usually magnify our emotional state at the time.

I'd ignore the pull yourself together brigade and take a slow day and buy some tulips or roses or a plant and if you have your kids today a Colin cake. Put up a birthday banner. And enjoy the small things.