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police welfare check - please help

34 replies

Bubbles9 · 23/02/2025 06:37

Good morning,

I was just hoping to hear some views on a situation that occurred last night. Yesterday, I received a call from the police asking if I had put a claim of DV in against my ex partner. I explained that the information was inaccurate and I was not supporting police action and it has been completed. The police officer started to talk about the DV and I cried whilst I recalled an outline of what had happened. She asked if I had support services for DV, I said yes thank you, and good friends. Said good bye and then took my child to Legoland for the day. That evening at 08.30pm the police turn up for a welfare check saying the officer on the phone thought I was 'slurring my words'. I explained the situation and said I had been crying - invited them in and let them meet the children, who one was watching telly after riding during the day, and the other just having a bedtime story. I'm currently going through court with my ex-who has been abusive. So it is all really scary. The police said all was fine and they were happy and left. But it has caused me to feel really worried.

OP posts:
Bubbles9 · 23/02/2025 11:19

That's right, I took the little one to Legoland - so thinking about it you are right

OP posts:
Bubbles9 · 23/02/2025 11:26

Im so sorry to read this and thank you for your kindness in sharing. Its means a great deal to me. Thank you. My overall priority is the children, so I try and make my decisions work back from there. I'm exhausted with the fear and the use of the court system to be used for bullying purposes. The girls are both doing really well at school and very settled. The smallest could be a little more settled but it is hard when parents split.

OP posts:
Bubbles9 · 23/02/2025 11:33

Thank you - I really appreciate your kindness - I honestly feel like it's enough for me right now. I just need to look after the girls. Thank you for understanding xx

OP posts:
myplace · 23/02/2025 14:00

Well Done for holding it together.

Have you done a Clare’s Law application? I wonder if there is more on his record than you are aware of?

Just bear in mind that there are many possibilities behind this, and try and stay alert.

Someone somewhere could be stirring to cause trouble, or else is more worried about your safety than you realise.

ThePoshUns · 23/02/2025 15:59

Yo can only get a Claire's Law disclosure if you're in a relationship

Cantgetausername87 · 23/02/2025 20:09

ThePoshUns · 23/02/2025 15:59

Yo can only get a Claire's Law disclosure if you're in a relationship

Not true. You can do a clares law request on an ex partner and especially one where you share children. In this situation it would be granted.

Singlemumof3fleddv · 26/02/2025 03:10

You need support babe...just from ur post I know ur going through shit...trust me I've been there.
Pls contact refuge or next chapter...I dontvknkw ur story but I know somethings not right. I fled dv 4 years ago ...me n my 3 kids...I lost my kids (3 weeks only thank god) but down to emotional abuse...coz he was a cunt n I stayed with him as it was safer than leaving the him. Pls reach out to dv charities. The police r no help...pls don't be alone xxx

Singlemumof3fleddv · 26/02/2025 03:14

Situations like this are exactly why I want to work with woman experiencing dv...been there myself...now ready to kick ass n help other woman...
It's a man's world...but we stand united...stay strong gorgeous girl...you've got this xxxxx

Biscuitsnotcookies · 26/02/2025 05:21

You do sound like you need much more support op, you sound very vulnerable. Are you in touch with a counsellor? Charities that can support you?

It is one thing deciding not to prosecute, quite another to try and manage this by yourself. He sounds truly awful op.

I can see why you want to protect your girls from losing their home, school etc but I do think it’s important that you are supported fully and continue to be honest about your experiences. Record every interaction. Keep a log of the abuse. Photographic evidence. Emails. Photos of injuries and consider a restraining order.

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