Stepping off the gas regarding career for the kids/family benefit. Terrible idea?

[DrRichardWebber]

After being made redundant last year I’ve been lucky enough to be offered two jobs. I’m really struggling to make a decision. Having two young children is swaying the decision, and I’m not sure it should. My DH has an intense career but is still 50/50 with kid and house stuff and can work from home 2 - 3 days a week.

Both these roles are the same job title and small teams underneath.

Job 1: with a well regarded company in an exciting, busy role. Expect pressure to perform and 2 - 3 office days then the rest working from home. It would look great on a CV. Lots of interesting projects. And I have equity for when it eventually sells, which is on the horizon. No idea how much that would be worth though.

Job 2: with a much much less well regarded company. A less pressured role with not a huge amount of projects. I worry if things went wrong it would be difficult to get another job. However it pays 20% more than Job 1 and is completely home based, so I could be around much more for the kids. I imagine I might get bored and unmotivated. But love the idea of the salary and the ability to spend much more time with the kids.

Help me decide?!

Can you negotiate salary and office days for job one?

Thanks, sadly I’ve pushed job 1 as far as they will go in both respects.

I appreciate this is a nice decision to have.

How old are rhe children and how old are you? How.much higher could you go career and pay wise. All those would influence me.

What length/ stressiness of commute for job 1 as that's a factor for me? Also what kind of childcare would you have, for me there's a world of difference between a stressful job where you know you have someone who can pick kids up from school if you're running late or look after them at home if they're sick, and a stressful job where you also at any minute might have to drop everything because your child is peaky and dash to nursery or whatever. If the salary differential on job 1 is high enough that you can afford some really good help at home then I'd go for it personally, for me I always did want to be engaged and challenged at work even when kids were different, job 2 sounds limiting in more ways than one, but could be a stopgap if you're about to say you have 18 month old triplets with zero childcare help or similar?

Job 1. And j say that based on how you've written your OP. You are driven and ambitious and you want a shared family life with DH whilst being a present parent but don't want to put your career on the back burner whilst they're young. Sound right? I get it. I'm you. And I would take job 1 each and every time. But it comes with sacrifices - your own. Hugely. If you're prepared for that, do it. The higher salary of job 2 isn't your motivator. Good luck! Mine are now 11 and 8 and we have made it work. It's tough at times but I couldn't have worked and been bored/less fulfilled etc given the choice - which you have!

This OP.
Good luck with your choice x

I think Job 2 would be a good option. However, that depends on the ages of the children. If they are very young Job 2 would be more suitable so you could be there for them. If they are slightly older and not babies I think Job 1.

Job 1 sounds much better. Job 2 sounds like a dead end.

Job 1 sounds like it offers fulfilment as well as expectations but with good prospects and the buy out in the not too distant future could give you further options.

option 2 sounds like you’d be a bit bored and limiting down the line.

Thank you so much for all your answers. For many many reasons I decided to go with job 2. And to be honest, I should probably just be grateful for the options and for having a young family who I have to try and work around!