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Original poster

Disappointing advice from GP regarding weight management, where to go for help?

33 replies

Normansglasseye · 14/02/2025 09:27

Quick background - DS19 has suffered with mental health issues since he was young. He struggled with a lot of school anxiety/school refusal at secondary school but I managed to get him some therapy which put him in a better frame of mind, he left school, got himself an apprenticeship and has been in a good place since.

He has always been very slim but over the last year he has gained 8 stone in weight. He appears to be ok mentally and I believe this weight gain is probably because is his now more content and relaxed in life, in a relationship and slipping into poor foods choices as he has a tendency to not come home for dinner and eat out a lot since he's been driving and earning.

He hasn't been feeling well recently and seems to pick up a virus/cold almost every other week. He is also getting a lot of tummy pain and feeling nauseated a lot of the time. I am worried his unhealthy lifestyle and large weight gain is going to result in poor health.

He went to the GP yesterday for advice on weight loss as I had hoped they may be able to guide him to a weight loss management programme but all the GP said to him was for him to make better food choices and eat healthy (well, surely if he was doing such a thing he would not have gain such a large amount of weight in 12 months).

So, where can he go for advice? He refuses to go anywhere like Weight Watchers or Slimming World as he says it will all be full of older women and he will feel uncomfortable. I have suggested that he tries a local gym and asks the PT there to help him but he hates any form of exercise and the only sports he likes is motor racing. He is going to get a bike soon so he can bike to work so hopefully that will help.

Any advice? I am worried if he doesn't start tackling this soon he will fall into a trap of being very overweight and not having any incentive to lose it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Normansglasseye · 14/02/2025 13:54

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 14/02/2025 12:34

Sounds like a medical issue is quite likely

If he starts biking to work and that's a regular thing, that will help. The other is weight training. Exchanging muscle for fat will burn it all off even faster so I'd get a PT [assuming it's affordable] to focus on that. A body coach subscription is an alternative.

Is he buying all the unhealthy food himself? Because not having it in the house if you're doing the shopping is the best way to support him.

If a PT is affordable I'd also be taking him private medically to square away that risk quickly and expedite the tests. He must be at risk of diabetes with such a huge weight gain.

Yes, he is purchasing all the offending foods outside of the house. We have healthy foods here at home and he can cook whatever he wants but often goes out to eat, making bad choices on an empty stomach. I think he has simply fallen into very bad habits.

I am very worried that he is putting his body under pressure and I was hoping at the very least the doctor would have taken his blood pressure and weighed him.
When he comes home from work I will ask him which bloods the GP is checking and will take him to a private GP if need be.

OP posts:
Softpebbles · 14/02/2025 13:59

Most local authority’s have a weight management service, have a look on their website. You can often self refer.

Original poster
Normansglasseye · 14/02/2025 13:59

Bjorkdidit · 14/02/2025 12:48

He needs to work out how to make it easier to access better choices when he's hungry, ie prepping food and having it with him, or buying better food while out, because I suspect a lot of it is he's hungry after work, so he's getting fast food rather than coming home to make something healthy because that's obviously much quicker/easier and means he has food 'now' instead of in an hour or two's time.

But with a family history of underactive thyroids, that does sound like a possibility.

I don't think his work colleagues help the situation, a couple of the are also overweight and they all go to the local shop and chip shop for lunch. Ds takes lunch with him but I often find it in the back of his care and he will admit they all got themselves something from 'down the road'!

It's exactly as you say, he will often not come home for dinner but will go straight to his gf's, they will then pop to the local Tesco around 9pm for dinner. He has fallen into a bad routine and needs to work himself back into healthy eating and a decent routine.

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Exercise & fitness Fitness Weight management
BecauseRonald · 14/02/2025 14:07

Eating the wrong foods (processed/convenience/takeaways) along with a newly sedentary lifestyle (i.e. sitting all day at work, long driving, sitting in evenings) can rapidly increase weight. Especially in a major change of lifestyle, i.e. leaving school/college, starting work, getting a car, etc).

I agree.

I went on sertraline for anxiety in early 2020. The mixture of a sudden sedentary lifestyle, not feeling sick all the time with anxiety, and the medication removing any sensation of fullness meant I was putting on a pound a week. It tapered after about 3-4 months at which point I had gone from healthy BMI to overweight.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 14/02/2025 14:33

Would he try to use an app ... myfitnesspal?

AppleAllSpritz · 14/02/2025 20:52

At his age, once medical conditions have been ruled out, I would say biking and switching back to some of his healthy meals will be an excellent start to losing the excess weight. He doesn’t have to stick to a healthy diet strictly all the time, and social meals + drinks are important events to look forward to. There is no need to go onto weight-loss injections at 19 years old even if it turns out that his weight gain is entirely related to lifestyle changes. Reversal of some of his unhealthy lifestyle habits will serve him best in the long term, rather than medication. (I say this as a weight management doctor who prescribes these injections)

Original poster
Normansglasseye · 15/02/2025 11:24

AppleAllSpritz · 14/02/2025 20:52

At his age, once medical conditions have been ruled out, I would say biking and switching back to some of his healthy meals will be an excellent start to losing the excess weight. He doesn’t have to stick to a healthy diet strictly all the time, and social meals + drinks are important events to look forward to. There is no need to go onto weight-loss injections at 19 years old even if it turns out that his weight gain is entirely related to lifestyle changes. Reversal of some of his unhealthy lifestyle habits will serve him best in the long term, rather than medication. (I say this as a weight management doctor who prescribes these injections)

Thank you, I would definitely not want him to go on to weight loss injections, I am certain he can lose the weight with a bit of willpower and determination.

I have told him he doesn't need to go without his favourite foods, I have always lived by the 80/20 rule, if not life is pretty miserable.

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