I am in a dliemma, 40 year old 3 kids youngest starting school this year feeling extremely Sad about this crying most days already and not until September, constantly thinking is another baby the answer a little one running around again, am i being selfish?, will I feel better once i got used to all 3 being in school, i feel like in my 20s i was against kids one of the i dont want kids ever and happy with that decision, until i had my own and realised how much i loved being a mum a role i feel i was born for....