I'm so fed and can't cope.

[Likki]

I've just had a huge rant at dh. I am fed up with the kids and him. I do everything in the house. If I don't do it. It didn't get done. From car insurance to cooking and homework to DIY and everything in between it all comes down to me. I'm fed up today. I snapped and just had a massive rant. I have developed a chronic illness which makes me feel exhausted most days and it's just getting worse each year. I can feel myself just falling apart but I have to keep going to keep everything running. The only "responsibility" he has is the washing / ironing. With each passing year, I'm being a little worse as a mother and I feel like I'm failing my kids.

I am exhausted and just want to drive to my nearest airport and jump onto the first plane.

Could you really not go away by yourself for a few days to completely rest and recover plus giving them all a kick up the arse?

Get a Premier Inn room in a nice town where there's things that interest YOU, sleep as much as you want, eat what and when you like.

Surely that's doable? Surely?

@BMW6 Ha! Id be lucky if I got the house to myself for a couple of hours let alone leave for a few days.

Why just don't do it?

Because she'd just come home to a shit tip and spend the next week catching up.

If so I would ask myself if I wanted to stay in the relationship.

Well nothing will change unless you do something about it!

If you dropped down dead they'd have to cope so just pack a bag and go!

Don't be a martyr and just moan about it as so often we do. Be proactive and tell them it changes or you're gone permanently - just like millions of men do every day the world over.

Use that anger and tell everyone what to do.
What's wrong with your dh?
Your dc benefit from helping out too.
How old are they? Mine could hoover from 8 and do lots of little tasks.
Failing that, Ryanair have lots of cheap flights to places. Book an Airbnb and explore a city and recharge your batteries. I did exactly that late November.

This is the issue. My DH. He just leaves everything to me. He is absent. He is like that as a husband. I feel lonely in my marriage.
Kids - they do stuff to sort themselves out but it's up to me to be on top of their homework/ take them out / sort school stuff out / attend parents evening. They are becoming like their dad. Just holing up in their rooms.

How old are the kids?
If you can get them out of their rooms and spending some time with you and each other, that would be a good a thing.
Would they watch a film with you? Go out for cake and coffee?

If you want to jump on a plane, do it. Take a whole week in the sun (Heck if your kids are over 11, take a fortnight). Get the easyjet app and look at flights for tomorrow. Get on booking.com and book a hotel in a resort not far from the airport.

Play de ingles is a good shout.
If you don't need hot hot weather, malta pretty much anywhere. Or benidorm, it's a longer journey from the airport but the transport links are good.

You're your own person first and a mum second. The kids will their dad they'll be fine. Go.
You're not tied at the ankle.

Longer you can stay away the better. And make it clear that you come home and he's done fuck all, you'll turn around and leave again. With the kids.

Do you work op? If so can you get signed off for a bit? You sound burnt out. I have a chronic illness too and if you keep on pushing doing things you'll just make yourself worse. My DH doesn't do much either and we have his MIL here with dementia so it can be intolerable. I started LDN a month ago though and it's really starting to help with the exhaustion.

You're a single parent already so you might as well lose the dead weight.

You'd at least get a break when the kids are with him.

Has ur DH always been like this?
Or has he all of sudden turned into a man child?

You need to set your new boundaries, it's your weekend too. You are also in need of support including mental health.

Ask for help. If you don't get it just let things go. I hope you feel better. Do not drown yourself ....