Would your son share a bed with a friend?

[JosiesOnAVacationFarAway]

Just curious! At 18?
DS had a friend round last night and he stayed over, they shared a bed.
DS is bisexual.

I will of course ask him when he is home. I know no-one knows but him, but DH reckons it's just a place to crash situation. But at 18 I wouldn't have shared a bed with a friend platonically.

I am just being a nosy bugger admittedly and I fully acknowledge its non of my beeswax if he doesnt care to share later! 🤣🤣

At 18 my male friends would share beds, I would share a bed with both my male and female friends at that age too. Never anything else going on. Usually double beds though, less likely to share a single bed.

Oh well, then yes of course you should ask your 18 year old if he got laid last night. That's totally appropriate and won't be at all awkward or inappropriate. I mean, if he hasn't shown any interest in a relationship before then he must be totally confident and at ease with potentially developing one and his mum quizzing him about his sex life, lack if or potential will be really helpful. Won't add pressure at all. 🙄

I've never shared a bed platonically in my life but I don't think it's weird, I know others do it. But you CANNOT nose into this, he'll tell you if he wants to.

My DS absolutely would not, he won’t even share a room!
DD would. I think boys see it differently.

You absolutely can’t ask him though!!

I always shared beds with my friends, especially after nights out

Always shared!

Please don't ask him about it!

I think at 18 whether he was making the beast with two backs or not is up to him and the other person.

Ive slept in a bed with both my besties more than once happened last weekend we got hammered not our fault lol friend.
We are all almost 40s.
Bestie1 a bi woman im bi and our gay drama queen full of sass men only for him but we get on have done since year 7.

Why?

Because I think straight boys are more likely to conscious (and worried) about people jumping to the wrong conclusion than straight girls.

This. Most recently a couple of years back flying to NY on a work trip with a friend/colleague, when a major blizzard closed all NY airports and lots of flights got rerouted to Atlanta, where we felt lucky to get the last room in a hotel full of stranded travellers!

Mine is ASD and no way would he share his bed platonically! But maybe yours would. I'd certainly be asking in a wink wink way - if you don't want any questions asking then don't be having people back to your parents house IMO!

I'd certainly be asking in a wink wink way - if you don't want any questions asking then don't be having people back to your parents house IMO!

That’s appalling.

Why are people acting like it's offensive to ask your own child if they have a boyfriend?!

I asked him if the person was just a friend or a boyfriend and he said just a friend and he wasn't offended by me asking at all 🤣🤣🤣

Also you can't win on MN, if i didnt say I was going to ask him (which i got flack for) i would have had people saying 'well why dont you just ask him. No one on here knows'

Whys it appauling?

I wouldn't have dreamt of bringing someone back to my parents house for sex without them knowing the person and giving permission. I would have been out on my arse for that kind of behaviour.

I don't have that same point of view with my own kids but if one of them is in a romantic relationship I would want to meet the person and have a talk about ground rules before they started stying over.

Asking if they are friends/more than or whatever is ok (but nosy, if he wanted to tall to you about it he already would have)
But you were implying you were going to ask if he had been sleeping in the bed together platonically or having sex, and imo that level of interest in your adult teens sex life is icky.
'Hey, are you guys dating' is way less creepy than 'hey, are you sleeping together IYSWIM'

Why on earth would I ask him of they had sex??

🤣
Where are you getting that from? I never mentioned sex at all??

You can see from my 2nd reply I was talking about him being in a relationship.

You don’t think maybe you could have waited until he chose to tell you?

Not if I suspected they were sexually active, he's not a NT 18 year old. He's autistic and very young for his age. He still writes Christmas lists which consist of mostly teddies and sweets!

Sure. My DD (19) is off to stay with a friend and she has a double bed in their student halls s they will share. I also recall sharing beds with friends - in fact at my friend's 60 birthday st an Airbnb four had to share beds.
It really is just a place to crash. And if not, so what? They are adults.

Yes. Mine would and does with both male and female friends. Heterosexual male. He hangs out in wide mixed sex groups of friends and often has people stay over and stays over at theirs. It isn't seen as a big deal at all these days.