How fo is say no and mean it with back bone

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I have 2 grandsons one is 7 the other is 2 in a couple of months . The 7 year old i baby sat for a few hours 3 times a week whilst dd gos gym . He then started school. And DD had another baby and now I'm having him 3 times a week whilst she's at gym.

I have always done it because I felt she should have something for her that's positive for her. But im starting to resent doing lt .

I also pick GS up from school every day . To be fair it does not make a big difference to me as my children go to the same school. Plus it's so much less stressful without her.

She gos to the smaller type gyms . I think they are private but not overly expensive. I really want to suggest she gos to a council run gym where they have a crèche. But I feel guilty and I want to have some back bone and stick to it.

When there's been a gap in the past because of illness or something like that i just feel so much better amd content in my self.

I also have young children and my own life stresses to.

I know I have bought lt on myself but now I want to change it. But im thinking if I have no back bone I'm just going to continue being a mug.

Just tell your daughter what you’ve said here
You’ve given plenty of help and you’re struggling
by facilitating her down time you’re compromising your own

Just say, "You know I love having grandchild but this arrangement is no longer working for me. From next week it would be great if you made other arrangements."

"I know it's a pain but it's no longer working for me."

Does she work? Or is this all gym time

Depends where you are op. None of the council sports facilities/pools/gyms iny city have any childcare facilities at all.

If you can't do it any more you need to say so.

Yes but last time you said you didn't like her picking her child up from the school at the same time you pick yours up, because her and her DC were always shouting/arguing with each other.

So wouldn't she just end up doing the school run more often?

Well, you decide whether you prefer to continue doing something you don’t want to do or actually being clear and communicating that you no longer want to do it — what’s the better option?

Sorry you proposed and you’ve been happy to do that for years. I don’t get from your post you’ve been guilt tripped etc…. You said yourself you’ve been happy with it because you know it’s good for your dd.

Now you want to change things because it’s too much. That’s fair enough. Just tell her!
But please start from a pov that ot doesn’t work for you. The fact you’ve been feeling like this for a while and getting resentful she hasn’t read your mind isn’t her fault.
As for the gym, it’s up to her to decide where to go. Not all council backed gyms have a crèche anyway.

Ah sorry i was just saying generally what I do for her. I would still get her son from school regardless if she gos to the gym or not . That's not really a problem. She's moving soon anyway she's only going to be a 10/15 min walk from the school. And because there's no buses to get she will manage better.