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"No worries"

1 reply

stillalittlehurt · 29/01/2025 03:01

DP has recently started using "no worries" to respond to any potentially tricky conversations.

It can be as trivial as me saying "darling, could you please unpack your suitcase, it's been taking up space in our bedroom for days." His response : "no worries."

It's not a "don't worry, I'll get it done tonight," but a "no worries" as if I'd just thanked him for making me a coffee, or apologised for being late.

It can also happen when I try to address something more serious. I told him I felt hurt that he'd called my postgrad a "hobby," and again he replied with "no worries."

There have been several other instances in the last few months - it seems to be a new thing (we've been together for six years). It's driving me absolutely insane - actually, it IS worries, stop telling me it's not! It's also just an incorrect and bizarre usage of the phrase.

I don't think he's doing it maliciously, but he's very conflict avoidant - this has been an issue for us in the past. It very much stems from his childhood - I have tried to adjust my approach to be more constructive and positive, but we clearly still need to improve communication.

I've tried talking to him about the "no worries" but usually get another brush off, or an insincere "ok, sorry." How do I handle this effectively the next time it happens?

OP posts:
podthedog · 29/01/2025 03:34

I'd just clarify, does that mean you will do it tonight/tomorrow/this week etc (I.e. whatever your expectation is).

That's just from observing my parents relationship. I don't think it's generally very helpful going down the route of critiquing someone's communication style, it's more about trying to understand what they mean, so asking simple open questions.

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