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Nitpicking manager

28 replies

MyCatNamedCookingFat · 26/01/2025 19:21

I need some advice please on dealing with a frustrating situation that’s honestly making me question my capability. After 14 years away, (I was working but part time jobs to fit in around childcare) I’ve just returned to a formal workplace office. I’ve got a solid track record and extensive experience and my last role was as a senior manager. But it was a long time ago and a different sector so a lot of this role is brand new to me, like working in the gas industry when you used to work in water, added on top of that new systems, all meetings on teams, its a lot!

I'm back now as a junior, quite happy not to have the stress of anything more and I like leaving at 5pm and not having to worry about work. Except I am now because of this.

I’ve got a supervisor two grades above me who’s constantly nitpicking my work.
I fully expect to make some mistakes — it's overwhelming being back in an office environment, and there's a lot to get up to speed on. But this feels next level. A few examples:
I get called out for thin minor stuff like one time they saw double spacing between two words in an email.
Sarcastic comments if I get a person's title wrong like ' this person is Head of blah and blah unless you know better than me' WTAF?
If I make the same mistake once, I get called out again, in front of the head of the department, like I’m a kid being reprimanded: " I told you to be more careful."
If an email bounces back, I get an email asking what I did about it and I should double check the addresses. It was one bounced email and I wasn't to know a person left?
Called out for not having the corporate background on a teams call, when nobody else did either!
And worst of all: after my first week, they posted things I hadn’t done correctly in the shared project doc. After one week of training. (And no formal, written process to follow, by the way.)
Oh, and I got a lecture today about how I was sending the wrong emails to a senior manager, even though my email was exactly the same as what everyone else sends!

I’m trying to take it all in stride, but I feel like I'm stuck in a cycle of being publicly criticized for minor stuff that everyone else seems to doing. Am I being too sensitive here, or do I have a legit case of being micromanaged?
How can I handle this? Anyone been in a similar situation? I’m starting to wonder if this is normal or if I’m just getting bad vibes.
Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
MyCatNamedCookingFat · 08/02/2025 14:32

It continues. They don't have my back and still getting told off on teams meetings. I've been a nervous wreck.
I'm going to start looking for an another job.

But first I'm going to ask them at my next supervision what their motivation was the first week of my job leaving me with nothing to do and having to contact dept head on her day off.

Then I'll tell them that the way the behave reflects only in them as they haven't inducted or trained me properly and that they aren't a supportive manager calling me out as a junior member of staff in front of senior managers makes them look bad.

On Friday I had a task assigned to my workstream. In fact, it was for my manager. I didn't know it had been wrongly assigned until I saw the email in the sent box by accident.

Yet at weekly meeting they let me talk about this new task, knowing they had already dealt with it. I mean, who does that, so puerile. Utter tosser.

My confidence was rock bottom. But I'm not going into victims mode. Had a good cry last night but fuck them, they aren't living in my headspace any longer. The lesson learnt is to fight back.

OP posts:
ExitViaGiftShop · 10/02/2025 17:00

Sorry to hear this. Get all this down on an email and raise a grievance. I wonder if this could be constructive dismissal? Can you speak to ACAS? You have been set up to fail from day one. Glad you are finding your outrage and sense of injustice!

ExitViaGiftShop · 10/02/2025 17:03

I would record the meeting if you are going to question them about their behaviour towards you, esp if it's just you two in a meeting room. You can't trust them.

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