Work trip - help me enjoy it and not feel guilty!

[DaysofHoney]

I’m heading tomorrow off on a week long work trip (including travel days). It’s to a wonderful city on the other side of the world!

I’m growing anxious in my middle age, and I’ve been a bundle of nerves and guilt for weeks (leaving two upper primary aged DC at home with perfectly capable DH and nanny).

Does anyone travel regularly for work and have any mantras or helpful tips for me? I’ve never been away from the kids this long and I can’t shake the butterflies. Can’t even put my finger on what’s making me anxious. I don’t like flying, but manage okay with some beta blockers and a glass of wine!

thanks in advance to anyone who can give me a shake and help me enjoy the opportunity and reassure me the kids won’t miss me that much (plenty of downtime in a glorious hotel etc)!

The kids might miss you but I've always softened the blow with the promise of Lego, always helped!

Anxiety is normal especially if you've not travelled much without them.

I travel to US often without kids for conferences etc and I make the most of my time reading, and any spare days I'll book a city tour and join a group sightseeing, a lot of fun!

Use your time to fill it with things you don't get much time to enjoy (if there are things!)

I've done it so often I have a list of things I treat myself to, massages, browsing book stores, dinners out, or staying in with books I've ordered. Love it!!

Thank you - just the sort of thing I need to hear. I’ve promised a treat from the Nike and American Girl store!

I travel plenty for work and it's such a lovely break. I always find it funny because my colleagues with children see it as a relaxing break, and those without find it very full on 😂

Your children may be a little old, but I like taking DSs chosen toy (currently a dumper truck) with me and take photos of it looking out the plane window/settling into the room etc.

Find a good time to FaceTime that ISN'T in the thick of it all. Normally for me when I'm in the US depending on which coast I'm on it's after school during TV/chill time, or bedtime AFTER all teeth/pjs are done!

I normally pick up a few extra small gifts. So I bring DS the toy set he's requested, but also a small bar of chocolate/book/t-shirt as I see them, so it's more of an adventure when helping me unpack 😂 This may not be sustainable if you have more than one child though!

Mostly just enjoy it, and lean into what you feel like doing around work hours. Depending on my mood I'll sightsee/take a fun exercise class/have solo dinners/just order room service and watch a good movie 😋

Thank you - yes, two of the dolls are coming with me for a salon appointment at American Girl doll to have their ears pierced (??!!) and I’ll be taking loads of pics for DS who is a plane nerd.

I think I’ll be okay once there and into it, it’s this build up that’s awful!

Rob Beckett has a great line on this.

It’s work. It needs to be done because that’s what supports the family life we enjoy.

No one has a better time by me being miserable when I’m away, and it just carries over to when I get home.

Best thing is for me to get most out if time I’m not at home, and the time at home.

The first evening you have free, get some extra towels from the hotel. Spread them out on the bed to make a picnic blanket. Get into your comfy clothes. Order room service or get a takeaway. Get as glass of wine and a dessert if you are inclined. Spend the evening either watching tv or reading a book uninterrupted.

you will feel refreshed and relaxed. soon you will realize that a hotel room all to yourself is one of the best things for a parent with children at home.

Take it as time to recharge your batteries so you can continue to give them 100% when you're back.
You need and deserve it. Make the most of it, do stuff just for you, not just pampering but enjoy the time and space think about what you want in your life, career etc.

It will be gone before you know it!

Mantras?

Oh god the American Girl store is eye wateringly expensive 😂

My adviice, don't FaceTime / call them, let them know you'll be back on x day and see them then. Calling always made mine more anxious. Go and enjoy your trip, miss them and be excited when you see them. I travel a lot with work.

Thank you - yes DH travelled a lot over the last few years and FaceTime was always hard. Quick phone call every other day seemed to suffice. Funny, he used to be away for weeks at a time and after a day or two it just feels okay and normal. I’m sure this will feel the same. Thanks