6 yo DS - possible ADHD, ASD?

[6yomum]

This may sound a bit daft, but can ADHD "appear" overnight? Or are there other things (like trauma) that can mimic the symptoms? I'm aware some ND (like ASD) become more obvious when children start school, but is this also true for ADHD?

DS was always a cheerful, quiet, and cooperative child, everyone remarked on how sunny and sweet he was. We never knew him to be hyperactive, easily distracted, or to be violent or have problems with other children. He was in a nursery from 1 year until 3.5 and then spent 9 months in a school-based nursery. We had a couple of reports that he had reached out to strike another child in nursery but responded appropriately to correction and his behaviour was age-appropriate, generally he was very kind and set a good model for younger children. However, we then moved and he started reception in a different school where he was bullied and suddenly we saw a new and different side to him. He was impulsive and would hit or kick other children, or do unkind things like when one of his friends made him a drawing, he crumpled it up and said he didn't want it. This was (according to teachers and DS) mostly preceded by other children doing something unkind to him, calling names, for example, or excluding him from play, and he might smack them on the hand or kick them. Obviously this isn't okay but we saw it as fitting a pattern of mirroring the behaviour he experienced. He also has become a bit stormy and stroppy at home where previously he wasn't. Could this be an ADHD (or ASD) that was somehow masked for 5 years? We are moving towards getting diagnoses but the waits are so long. I am wondering if anyone else has experienced this.

I can only go on my experience with my own 6 year old. He has just been referred for Asd/Adhd at school. He was mostly fine in reception and pre school. At home since about the age of 3.5 he’s been an angry little fireball, very unpredictable, always hanging off door handles/bouncing on the sofa/unable to sit still at the table etc. it’s only just showing in school now though so they won’t do anything about it until it’s seen in school. They do seem to be able to mask it when they want too.

@PippetyPoppetyPie thank you. We’ve not had the fireball at home until he was bullied, though. I’m reading online that sometimes trauma can look like ADHD so perhaps we need to approach it differently.

Yes it can. Typical age for onset of signs is 6.

I'm not convinced that ADHD comes on overnight, I am actually pretty sure it doesn't.
Usually if you look back you can see signs from a very young age.
Although it is certainly true that a significant change in environment can mean that a dc that was once coping is no longer coping and is therefore displaying more symptoms.

ASD and ADHD don't "come on overnight". The reason that professionals are reluctant to diagnose ADHD before age 6 is because impulse control and executive functions aren't developed enough prior to this to be able to judge whether it's a developmental delay or not.

Both are generally able to be managed with the right environment. So the question is: is your son in a much worse environment where his behaviour is a consequence of that? Or, are the symptoms the same (but manageable) in other, more positive, environments?

@User0ne thank you. What sorts of things might you expect with ADHD that could have been hidden? It seems to me that his behaviour only started after the bullying but perhaps it is just a new class or new school that's triggered something? He didn't have any other accommodations at his previous school. And he has a younger sibling who he is very gentle with (well besides the occasional snatching but I reckon that is normal sibling behaviour, he never has reached out to strike or kick her).

@SnugNightsss @snowflakelake yes it's quite tricky, he never bounced on the sofa, got up and down from the chair, or that sort of thing, before. Not as a toddler or in nursery or nursery school. Now suddenly he does and we're scratching our heads. That's what I mean, he didn't have any of those behaviours until just now. Is it likely that this can just come out of the blue? Our wait for evaluation is at least one year and we may try to stretch for a private assessment but not sure if we'll be able to. Whether it is ADHD or ASD or just the effects of trauma, it seems like he needs help no matter what and it breaks my heart to see him like this.

ADHD does not appear overnight and if he's being bullied in school, trying to cope with this is much more likely to explain his behaviour especially with sudden onset. What are the school doing to support him, and have ypu spoken to them about it? I'm quite suprised anyone would even suggest ADHD without looking at a wider picture...

It's not that ADHD symptoms can be hidden; it's that if appropriate supports are in place the disability can be lessened and the symptoms can be less obvious.

If things have been pretty stable at home then you wouldn't expect to see significant changes in behaviour unless the person was more dysregulated from being at school.

Some of the behaviours you describe might just be normal pushing boundaries "getting up/down from a chair". My 6yr old literally can't sit for mealtimes - he fidgets so much he falls off the chair and often hurts himself - so he stands at the table instead.

Trauma seems a lot more likely from what you've said.