Birthday party - drop and go?

Seaside31 · 2025-01-22T21:02:16+00:00

FTM here and absolutely clueless. In your experience, what age do parents usually stop staying with their children at parties? Softplay party if that makes any difference.

TwentyTwentyFive · 22/01/2025 21:06

8 + depending on location. If the soft play is open to the public during the party then I'd imagine most parents would stay to keep an eye on their child.

Tumbler2121 · 22/01/2025 21:07

When you are happy that your child can enjoy themselves (and stick up for themselves if necessary) Maybe 8? depends on how well you know and trust the parents organising and how many other children they already know

Mintearo7 · 22/01/2025 21:09

If soft play so public place I would say 7. Around here it doesn’t really happen though until parties are more intimate eg cinema with 5 friends. I think it’s more about not putting extra pressure on the parents. We have left our 6 year old a couple of times when we were stuck but only at a house and when we could ask another friend's parents to keep an eye out.

mindutopia · 22/01/2025 21:10

With my first it was starting in Y1, but my youngest is now in Y2 and no sign of it yet. I just want to be able to leave and go! Or not have to entertain parents every year. 😩

delphinedupont · 22/01/2025 21:10

Ds is 8 and we’ve started leaving them. It’s joyful 😂. I think by 8 the parents know each other well enough and the kids have their groups they tend to stay in.

coxesorangepippin · 22/01/2025 21:11

Depends on the kid, and the host parents

LilacPony · 22/01/2025 21:12

Year 3, maybe year 2 depending on the situation. But I just put myself out there and be awkward and ask the parent if they want us to stay or not when I reply to the invite, and if I invite kids to parties I tell the parents straight if it’s a drop or stay when I send the invite out. Just makes it easier for everyone.

stichguru · 22/01/2025 21:24

Depends

exclusive use or public hire?
does DC know the other parents?
would DC be happy without you?
how many adults are there?

If you are going you need to be confident that your child will be happy without you and that the organisers and helpers are able to watch him safely. If it's busy they can't do this. Does it look like there are enough adults helping? If DC doesn't really know the parents and they don't know him then stay.

Original poster

Seaside31 · 22/01/2025 21:36

Should have said in my OP - this is not our party.

DC has been invited to one this weekend that I accepted the invite for a few weeks back. DC excited, gift all ready to go and I’ve just received a group message from the mum saying that due to limited space for adults it’s a drop and go party 🫤
I’d never have accepted the invite if I knew this - I’ve never met the parents as we drop off/pick up at different times and the kids are only in pre-school so 3-5 age range. I’d never feel comfortable leaving my child at that age with people I don’t know 😳
Im not being PFB here, am I? It’s too young!

OP posts:

raysofhope · 22/01/2025 21:39

Seaside31 · 22/01/2025 21:36

Should have said in my OP - this is not our party.

DC has been invited to one this weekend that I accepted the invite for a few weeks back. DC excited, gift all ready to go and I’ve just received a group message from the mum saying that due to limited space for adults it’s a drop and go party 🫤
I’d never have accepted the invite if I knew this - I’ve never met the parents as we drop off/pick up at different times and the kids are only in pre-school so 3-5 age range. I’d never feel comfortable leaving my child at that age with people I don’t know 😳
Im not being PFB here, am I? It’s too young!

that’s crazy for kids this young! There’s no way that mine would have been happy to let me go at this age (nor would I!)

TwentyTwentyFive · 22/01/2025 21:41

I’ve never met the parents as we drop off/pick up at different times and the kids are only in pre-school so 3-5 age range.

The parents are bloody insane. There no way any parent is going to leave their young child at a soft play with strangers and they are bonkers if they think they can supervise all these children alone.

I also don't understand how a soft play can't have enough room for parents...

ClairDeLaLune · 22/01/2025 21:44

You are definitely not being PFB! That's madness. How on earth will they supervise so many little kids? Also, soft plays usually have a café area where parents can sit. All sounds a bit bizarre.

suburburban · 22/01/2025 21:45

I think we used to do age 5 onwards or even 4 in the 90s

suburburban · 22/01/2025 21:46

Perhaps we had smaller parties

HappyWhenItsSnowing · 22/01/2025 21:49

No way at that age

Your child wouldnt even know what adult to go to if they were hurt

What about if they needed the toilet?

Big no from me

Original poster

Seaside31 · 22/01/2025 21:50

It is a very small venue, not like the massive soft plays with the full cafe/party room etc - I guess I just assumed that you account for parents in your total numbers at that age (eg, if your venue can only seat 30 people then you’re inviting 15 kids at most, expecting a parent to come along rather than inviting 30 kids).
Thanks for your replies though - it definitely feels far too young and just not something I’m comfortable with.

OP posts:

RainingCatsandFoxes · 22/01/2025 21:54

That is young to leave them. In saying that my daughter would probably not even realise Id gone! Could you leave them your mobile number in case if any problems?

anon168231245630 · 22/01/2025 21:55

5 in my area providing the kid is happy to be left

Starryknightcloud · 22/01/2025 21:57

Not a chance OP!
My child is this age and has allergies too and they can't read a food packet so no way I'll leave them.
Even if it wasn't for that then itd still be a no

weareallqueens · 22/01/2025 21:57

My DD (nearly 6) would not stay at a party without a parent. Older DD has stayed without us since she was about 6.

MuggleMe · 22/01/2025 22:04

It's usually y1/2 IME. Before then they might need help with toileting, choosing food, reassurance etc.

LilacPony · 22/01/2025 23:04

Seaside31 · 22/01/2025 21:36

Should have said in my OP - this is not our party.

DC has been invited to one this weekend that I accepted the invite for a few weeks back. DC excited, gift all ready to go and I’ve just received a group message from the mum saying that due to limited space for adults it’s a drop and go party 🫤
I’d never have accepted the invite if I knew this - I’ve never met the parents as we drop off/pick up at different times and the kids are only in pre-school so 3-5 age range. I’d never feel comfortable leaving my child at that age with people I don’t know 😳
Im not being PFB here, am I? It’s too young!

Oh gosh way too young, and you’ve never met the parents either! I couldn’t do that either. If they needed help on the toilet, hurt themselves and needed comforting. I would say I’m so sorry, I wrongly assumed I could stay, my LO won’t be happy if I leave and I can’t leave you to deal
with that whilst trying to run a party.