Nervous about motorway driving

[Abcde0839]

I have had a full driving license for 10 years, I passed my test while pregnant and have barely been on the motorway since. Most of the time I have been the sole carer of young DC and had limited childcare, and I didn’t want to practice motorway driving with them in the car for obvious reasons - but now 10 years have passed, DC in school, and I really want to venture further out!

I’m a confident driver and drive everyday, but my lack of experience on the motorway is making me nervous to start. Mainly about driving at higher speeds than I’m used to, and getting on/off the motorway. Does anyone have any tips, or should I just stop being silly and get on with it?

We just got a new car too instead of an old banger so I don’t really have any excuse. Besides my nerves.

Does anyone have any tips?

Thanks in advance

I did a motorway lesson in my own car. The instructor got me to drive home on the A-roads, as they're actually more dangerous.

Motorways are by far safer to drive on than A roads . Avoiding motorways on long journeys from a safety point of view is bonkers.

You just need a bit of courage to face the irrational fear and some practice.

I don't say that driving at high speed is completely safe btw(there is always some risk), just that if you are going to do it, motorways are a safer way than A roads

I am also sympathetic..I had the same fear when I first learned to drive but it really is better to use the motorway for long journeys of you have a choice

Suspect so.

I always thought they could remove the controls fairly easily. In fact I have seen one removing the advert cones/plastic thingys outside the car - presumably to turn it into a "normal use car".

I suppose it is possible that the instructor could not easily remove the controls, and didn't trust themselves not to interfere but sounds like a long shot.

Motorway lessons are a good idea. I have recently (mostly) regained my confidence on motorways. The getting on is the bit that panics me so I used to check whether you got an extra lane on joining, as then you don't have to immediately get over. Although this can be the same on dual carriageways so you might be used to it.

There are times of day when motorway / dual carriageways are quieter (varies depending on the roads, but someone who is familiar with the roads will know when would be good for you to gain confidence) and you need to get more time on entering / exiting junctions, as once on the road it is a matter of lane protocol and you'll soon see that negotiating kicking out time at school is worse, as is driving on country roads with LED lights hitting you in the face!

You can definitely book motorway lessons, as lack of confidence on motorways is very common.

It's much better to admit you feel nervous and get some help with your experience than to just launch into it alone and feel stressed on the motorway - you're doing the right thing. I would also drive with the satnav on if you have it, as it prepares you to move over for the exit ahead of time.

Lots of good tips upthread. Plus here's some stats to support PP's saying motorways are the safest roads to drive in the UK (Good luck) :

"... Motorways represent the safest roads in Britain, something underscored by the fact that in 2020, according to Department for Transport (DfT) figures, there were 76 deaths recorded on Britain’s motorway network, despite carrying a much higher volume of traffic any other type of road.

They’re safer because oncoming traffic is separated via the central reservation Armco barrier. That makes head-on collisions, with a combined speed of possibly double your own, highly unlikely. Collisions are much more likely to occur with traffic travelling in the same direction of you, which means less energy is involved in a collision.

Motorways also offer hard shoulders or refuge areas (on smart motorways — see below), which means broken down vehicles can often be brought to a halt away from the live lanes of traffic.

And motorways are not open to slow and vulnerable traffic, such as pedestrians, horse riders and cyclists..."

https://www.driving.co.uk/car-clinic/advice/are-motorways-safest-roads-uk/

Do you know what? I was the same. Had been driving for 15 years and decided enough was enough. I took myself to a part of the motorway where the next junction is close and bit the bullet!

To celebrate further, I didn't get off at that next junction, or the one after that. I drove 15 MILES until my junction home. So pleased with myself. That was 9 months ago and I do pretty much the entire stretch of the M3 at least a couple of times a month, if not more.

So proud of myself! So go on, give it a try and report back! X

That's weird. It's a long time ago, but my instructor offered me motorway lessons after I'd passed.

In fact, DS1 passed 3 years ago and his instructor insisted he drove him up and down the M3 before going home!

I had a message motorway lesson after I passed my test, it was really useful.

If you can do a duel carriageway you can do motorways. I find them easier because you don't have the distraction of people coming towards you without a barrier.

Agree with the last point - see if you can safely move over if you can / need to, approaching an incoming slip road. Many will (correctly) point out that the highway code obliges joiners to "give way" and does not require existing traffic to move over. A quick look at speed limits will show this is nuts.

@Abcde0839
I was where you are now so fully understand the feeling.
I thought I would never drive on a motorway as the idea of joining in, terrified me.
It took time and practice, I also got a job 20 miles away and driving on motorway was often the quickest. But also getting more confident as a person, not just a driver. In my case I was getting divorced and determined to be able to do important life things on my own.
Now I do not mind motorways and actually find dual carriageways more stressful - there are only two lanes and I hate when I am overtaking and some idiot just sits on my back while I am trying to complete the manoeuvre and pull over. I usually drive at around speed limit so definitely not going too slow. It happens less on motorways as there are more lanes, so the racing drivers usually stick to the outside lanes.
Driving lessons are a good idea and then doing quite a bit of driving on your own when you are not rushed to get somewhere. Sunday mornings before the shops are open are quite good as there is less traffic.
I don’t know where in the country you are, but now there are quite a few ‘smart’ motorways with joining lanes, rather than slip roads so joining is less daunting. You can just take your time to feel the pace of the traffic before overtaking slow vehicles or before the lane leaves.

43 years old here and been driving since I was 26...only in the last 3 months have I been driving on motorways and I can't believe I didn't do it sooner!! 70 is the limit not the target- often, 50 in the inside lane is fine! Stick to a speed you're comfortable with, use your mirrors constantly, indicate and wait if needed and get past huge lorries if you don't like them (they're what put me off!!) If you go past your turn off, sat nav will bring you back the right way. Maybe choose a time when it's likely to be quiter eg 11am and try it for one junction...breathe! You can do it x

This is a stupid one but I found the lane assist on my car and i always press it when I do the motorways now, it helps me feel more in control and gave me confidence

As others have suggested - get Motorway lessons with an approved driving instructor.

I live motorway driving...as long as there are no traffic jams.

Try to remember it’s generally the safest way to drive. Relative speeds amongst other drivers are quite low and there is no oncoming traffic, corners are gentle.

Looking ahead is the key and learn to trust your mirrors.

Joining from slip roads is generally easy too as long as you get uoto
speed, ie 55-60+ mph. It’s worse if you try and join at less than this.

But as many pp have said, a couple of motorway lessons will do wonders for your confidence. Good luck, op.

Don't feel embarrassed, it's normal.

I was the same and had decided to do some additional lessons. And then one day i took the wrong exit on spaghetti junction..7 miles in the wrong direction. My husband calmly talked me through it and I realised it was really nothing scary. I'm actually now more confident on motorways than he is and don't think twice about doing it.

It's just practice, honestly.

Pick a quiet time of day like early Sunday morning, with good light, no rain, no frost or fog etc. Make sure you have enough petrol.

If you can pick a junction to join the motorway which joins as a 4th lane rather than merges with the left hand lane. As others have said, go at the speed you feel comfortable at, but ideally not much less than 60, unntil you feel comfortable. It's only on motorways that I ever need 6th gear, so it's good to practice that.

Don't hog the middle lane for no reason.

Keep a good distance between you and the car in front. Many drivers (mostly men, I've found) drive far too close to the car in front. If someone pulls into the gap in front of you so that they are too close to you, ease off the gas slightly to increase the safe gap again.

Be aware of junctions coming up as some cars will pull across lanes last minute and suddenly swerve to come off. Also there will be people joining the motorway as you pass too so give them plenty of room between you and the vehicle in front of you so that they can match your speed and get in front of you or behind you safely.

You will need to use your rear view mirror regularly to check for what's approaching from in the distance behind you in general. Some cars go ridiculously fast and whizz out of nowhere (drivers of black Audis, I'm looking at you).

Indicate when you change lanes. So many people don't. Before you change lanes make sure it's safe on both your left and right. People shoudln't undertake but they do. Do a quick glance over your shoulder before you move. Don't pull in too close to any cars that you've overtaken.

The most important thing is - do not panic if you come off at the wrong junction. Most people have a satnav these days so trust it to get you right again.

I find the worst part of driving on motorways is not the getting on and off the slipway but navigating complicated multi lane roundabout juctions with more than one motorway going off them. So many timese these days the paint has gone off the road and you don't know which lane you should be in if you need to go right round. And everyone else seems to know which lane they need to be in as they whizz round. So try to practise those sort of junctions more than once so you are familiar with which lanes you need to be in/switch to before joining the slipway.

Just practice.

Not stupid at all! My car has that, plus I also like the fact my car tells me whether I'm a safe distance away from the car in front. I know how to judge that by eye, but when it's busy and there's speed involved it is nice to feel like the car is keeping an eye out too

Thank you, I think other people make me feel judged sometimes 🤣