《Bangs head against the wall 》 anyone else married to a faffer (lighthearted)

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I love the bones of him. Together 34 years. I knew he was a faffer when we first met , but its getting worse.
He was getting himself ready to run a few errands when I left this morning to have a cut and blowdry. One hairdressing appointment later , plus a visit to the post office and he was still " getting ready". We are now an hour later and he still hasn't left.
Retirement has turned his ability to faff into an art form.
Please tell me im not the only person living with a faffer ?

Ex is a faffer.

Overheard DS yelling at him to not stand in the kitchen doing nothing and to not watch the kettle boil...

I'm a faffer, I'm a procrastinator. We are sorry, it's not intentional 😫

Oh nooo I'm also the faffer! Would be interesting to know if a relationship needs a faffer and a just-do-er to be succesful. Like Jon Richardson says there's always a "putter" and a "leaver".

@Pencilsieve @kiana2015 I do think that a relationship needs both .
And I know its not done intentionally, so I rarely even mention it to him.
He has finally left, which is good as one place he needs to get to is only open for another half an hour.

My ex was a faffer faffing about when things needed to be done always late.
Simple things took for ever.
I had enough of it.

Oh god, I feel your pain! My dad could faff for England.
Everyone would be ready to go out and he’d announce he’s just going too go and have a shower and a shave.

My mother and brother are faffers. One of my requirements in a relationship is that the other person is a non faffer. Faffers stress me out way too much.

My husband is !

Retirement is when faffers come into their kingdom, unfortunately.

I retired last year, and that's absolutely true @battairzeedurgzome
DH retired before me and I was always moaning at how late he got up, being lazy etc but having retired myself now, even though I get up first, he's still ready before me with my endless cups of tea and scrolling the internet.

My husband is. It drives me mad! He doesn't mean to do it but it takes an hour longer to get us (including a toddler) out of the house when he's around.

Updating as Im in an airport with King Faff of Faffonia. Im on my last thread of patience. So far he has managed to try to go back through security for his passport ( which was actually in his pocket) then decided to buy a bottle of water as our boarding started then had a browse !!.
Thoughts and prayers please 🙏

Sending all the anti-faff vibes, OP! (My sister and I are both married to faffers. We bond regularly over our mutual frustration...😤)

I used to know someone who was invariably faffing and dithering when we were supposed to be going out. But in his case IMO it was a control thing - he enjoyed making people wait, so did it just because he could.

Good luck for the airport!

My otherwise lovely DH is definitely a faffer. He has improved over the years (while I have got more relaxed), but it can still drive me crazy.

Last night was a prime example. He was cooking dinner, and it was a slightly more complicated recipe than usual that he’s only cooked once before. So instead of starting cooking at 6 so dinner would be ready for 7 at the latest, meaning DD would be in bed at her usual time, he decided at 6 that he needed to give the toaster a really, really, thorough clean 🙄 Ended up eating dinner after 8, DD in bed late (not the end of the world but she had an early swimming class this morning), and our plans for chilling after dinner and watching a film cancelled because it was after 9.30 when he’d finished all the washing up. And of course I cannot complain that he cooked a lovely dinner, and the toaster is very clean now. To be fair, he did apologise for serving up late (‘I didn’t think cleaning the toaster would take that long’) 😀

Ooh, yes! My husband is a proper Professor of Faffology, a world-renowned expert.

If it's not a time-critical thing I find it best to let him get on with it. E.g.if we are going out, not to a deadline, I say 'let me know when you're ready to walk out of the door' and I carry on with what I'm doing until that point, because I can be ready to go in 30 seconds. There's still usually a last minute faff from him, like he suddenly decides he wants to wear a different coat, but it's better than watching him go through the full 30 minute faff routine.

If it is time critical I give him an earlier time than actually needed as a deadline.

If it's going somewhere for a particular time, I say "I will be leaving at 08:15, with or without you".

I'm definitely the faffer. It's definitely not intentional. I find it unnerving when I'm ready on time, I feel that something is wrong so go back and check things then I'm rushing. It annoys me just as much 😩😂
I saw a funny video on Instagram the other week. The caption was "Me chilling before I have to rush to get ready to leave" (or words to that effect 😆) and this man was scrolling and sipping a drink. It was funny because it's so true!

I’m sitting here laughing at this. Last night I had a dream about my late husband - I was wanting to go out somewhere and I discovered he had decided to have a bath first! So even after he died, I’m still frustrated by his faffing!

His Saturday morning routine is 90 minutes of faffing for a 30 minute run. NINETY MINUTES to put on his gym kit and pick a song on his ancient iPod.

It’s quite something to behold and has us both in stitches x