How to recover from being dismissed from dream job

[christmascanfuckoff]

Hello all,

Fairly certain that I will be dismissed from my dream role after a disciplinary hearing next week. I don't agree with the reasons and feel I was sat up to fail. However at this point, it's inevitable as they are clearly dotting the is and crossing the ts.
In post 21 months. I'm not sure how to recover from it- I've been suspended on full pay for just over a month. My mental health is not good and I worked so hard for this job. I've got a job to go to but it's essentially a job I did ten years ago so it's many steps down the career ladder, but I need to support my three children.
My confidence is shot, I feel a shell of who I was and I wasn't expecting it at all.
Has anyone any tips on how to come back? At 38 I feel now that is it for my career.
Thank you

And call eltal http://bpp-pro-bono.developmentzone.co/blog/projects/employment-law-telephone-advice-line-eltal/

On your other thread you said it was because you had three weeks off for an operation, all of it pre-planned and approved... which isn't job-specific and would not be grounds for a disciplinary.

@christmascanfuckoff i think you need to be specific about the reasons.

That is not outing.

what is it related to?

is it financial? Is it a bullying accusation? Is it a remark about a colleague which has been deemed discriminatory? Is it attendance/ time keeping related? Or have you not met targets?

its difficult to offer advice without knowing this. Also, if it didn’t happen and is untrue, then what is their evidence?

if it’s untrue, then you should be able to defend this successfully because they won’t have the evidence.

im afraid no one can tell you what to do without more information.

but the one thing everyone is saying is that you need legal advice. It might be pricey but it’s better than losing your career.

Whilst I would never disagree about joining a union, it's unlikely a union would offer representative support for something that has already happened. You could certainly ask local stewards what they policy is, but it's not a given they will actively support an ongoing case.

Check your home insurance - it may offer legal support.

I once saw a solicitor about potential constructive dismissal. As a first step, she asked me to write a history of my involvement with the organisation. It was incredibly cathartic and enabled me to take a much more realistic view of what I wanted and what was achievable. So if you haven't done this, I'd recommend it.

As much as I appreciate all replies...the matter of thread wasn't really to seek any advice around dismissal rather how to get over it and if anyone has continued after a dismissal.

To the unkind poster below who said it would be a relief for the company- I really hope that you enjoyed being a keyboard warrior.

Continued as what? If you are professionally compromised you may need to reconsider that line of work. If it is due to behaviour think about ways you can overcome similar and what work/pattern supports that.

How do you mean continued?

I think I did try and engage with your original question- I think you need to stop perceiving it as your "dream job" and reframe your thinking about it all. Spend some time in your new job reflecting, and work out what direction you think you would like you career to go in next

The way you get over it is to acknowledge where you know you went wrong and either think about what you need to do to be able to go into a similar role in the future, or decide whether the dream job in fact wasn’t all you’d hoped, and give some thought as to what you would like to do in future.

Companies don’t suspend employees for a month without valid reason. And to jump straight to dismissal after that clearly means that it’s something serious.

We obviously don’t know what happened, but whatever it was you need to acknowledge it and own it, and that will hel you to make better decisions in future.

Either see the process through, see what happens and try to learn from it or resign. Take the other job. It may be a step down career wise, but it's a job and related to what you are doing now from the sound of things. Rebuild your confidence. Move on.

I suspect whatever it is is related to the emergency admission to hospital for two weeks in December. I presume the employer did not know about the OP's Bipolar 2 and whatever she has done/hasn't done is related to that. She may not even know what it is she's alleged to have done.

We can't advise properly without details. If you are taking the same approach in real life as you are in the thread then I suspect you have your head in the sand about something. A disciplinary doesn't come out of nowhere. Also it is not your dream job if you are being disciplined- more like your nightmare job. I would advise getting some professional help like paying a mentor or supervisor or career coach to guide you through the process and into your new role because it sounds like for whatever reason you are at risk of this happening again.

The letter about the disciplinary will state the issues raised. Why op seems ignorant of the link to their absence/behaviour is unclear. One may well be a consequence of the other.

I went through a bogus PIP process (after 7 years employed!!!!), a colleague was made redundant at same time on maternity leave. We later found out our immediate boss was going through similar and jumped to another job. Again this company was my dream and I had expected to be there for 15 + years

I won’t lie… it REALLY knocked my confidence and my career took a while to recover, same for the 2 others in the team

As I have processed it though (and especially worked in other companies where there is less nastiness, politicking and nepotism), I’m starting to think poorly of the company rather than myself

If the accusations are bogus then they are trying to find a cheap way to make you redundant at the cost of your self esteem and career prospects: what do you really think of a company like that?