Breastfeeding doesn’t feel nice - how do I stop?

[theprincessthepea]

I managed to EBF my baby until he started solids. Since then I’ve reduced feed time, mixing breast with formula. Now he takes breast for bed only and in the mornings, it’s easier for me that way (easy to get baby back to sleep and I’ve had to start working so I don’t have to worry about heavy leaky boobs!). He is 10 months old.

However recently I’ve started to hate the feeling of breastfeeding. But it seems that it’s the only way to get him back to sleep if he wakes at night. I’ve tried giving him a bottle, lullaby’s, rocking him back to sleep but he is hysterical. We are both not sleeping very well at all. I know sleep regression is common at this age. He might also be teething so I feel like I’m taking away his comfort.

But recently I just don’t like the way breastfeeding feels. Im going through alot in our relationship too and maybe it’s a mix of stress and overwhelm but I want to completely stop but I don’t know how to.

Any tips?

The kellymom website has a great section on how to stop breastfeeding. Very gentle.

Sounds like breastfeeding aversion OP, which can feel skin crawlingly awful. Often coincides with return of cycles or hormonal upheaval like pregnancy. There are lots of suggestions for things that can help if you google ‘breastfeeding aversion’. I also recommend the lactation consultant Olivia Hinge on social media - she has posted about this previously.

It might very well be saveable without needing to stop (unless of course you have reached a natural end yourself). Anecdotally I have heard that taking a calcium and magnesium supplement can help.

It's fine to stop!
Get him a dummy.
Drop the feed.
He'll cry for a few nights.
Then you'll get loads more sleep.
10 months is great well done 🙌

At 9 months I was done.. Lack of sleep was killing me. Sent dh in with a bottle of milk the first night.. Ds had an ounce. Second night dh offered water. Third night ds slept all night without waking at all and has absolutely loved his sleep since. Now 10 and a totally bed bunny!!

I agree it's fine to stop. Drop the bedtime feed. Then two days later, only feed after say 10pm. Make this a couple of hours later every couple of days until there's no feeds at all.

Your DH will need to do the non feed settles the first few nights to make it easier.

Close the factory and let someone else do settling/feeding a couple of weeks until he stops associating you with food for comfort.

Also, I don't think stopping breastfeeding guarantees better sleep (didn't with any of mine) but it does mean you don't have to deal with it all, and also if you're feeling done with breastfeeding it can be preferable not to feed each wake-up.

And also well done for getting this far, 10 months is brilliant.

@Puddlelane123 it really does feel like breastfeeding aversion! I’ve never heard of that until this post. I will look up techniques. It definitely feels like my hormones are balancing out, so this will make the most sense. I thought I was going insane.

@JellyFlooding I wish it did! But I’m hoping that he will stop screaming for breast milk at least!

@NoCarbsForMe sadly he spits the dummy right back out! He stopped taking the dummy before he turned 3 months old. Which hasn’t helped. I will try everything else and get through these nights.

Thanks everyone. I thought I was going insane until I read all of these replies. 10 months feels like an achievement. We didn’t even reach 1 month with my first due to mastitis- so I’m glad we’ve made it this far second time around.

10 months is a huge, huge achievement, and you should rightfully feel really proud of that. Whatever happens going forward you know that, and also that breastfeeding aversion is real and intense and driven by factors beyond your control. I had it with mine at various stages of the feeding journey and I can’t tell you how weird the skin crawling sensation and intense desire to throw them off me was. Unless you’ve experienced it you really wouldnt realise how hard it is to push through, or how primal it feels.

So whatever happens, no guilt allowed!