Who’s responsibility is it?

[Kelllli]

For this, bit of a debate maybe?

I do think it’s joint.

So, seeing grandchildren.

Is it down to the parents to say “we’ll bring xyz down are you in”
or
should grandparents ask about seeing their grandkids?

Quite a mixed debate amongst me and my mum friends.

Bit of both really, same as any other relationship. In an ideal world, both parties will be doing an equal amount of inviting/asking.

Depends on circumstances surely? It's nobody's sole responsibility, there should be give and take but there can be reasons why people cant travel etc..

I think it is age dependent honestly for the grandparents and the grandchildren. We found it easier to have grandparents here as the children had their toys, back garden toys etc. What I will say though is my parents were treated as family so my Mum would make a cup of coffee for herself when she wanted one. My PIL would want to be treated as guests so waited on hand and foot. This was the same at their house though, so even though it was Dh's childhood home for 20 years he wasn't allowed in the kitchen to make a drink because he no longer lived there. Not warm and fuzzy parents.

My Mum came over in the week during the day, did the school run with me (sahm) and looked after our children the same evening for a couple of hours whereas MIL still worked so we saw them every 6 weeks or so. They didn't want more than that due to spending weekends away from home.

Basically it was a dance we did. Both sets of parents were an hour away. My Mum had other grandchildren the same age as mine. PIL had no other grandchildren. I think it is individual to the families.

I don’t think you can define it and every circumstance is different.