I know there is little I can do but I am so worried about my adult son's weight gain and future health.

[Armyofprawns]

Adult ds but only just, he is 19 and still lives at home.

Ds has always been slim but always enjoyed his food. Over the last year he has gone from 11 stone to 18 stone. He is over 6 foot so carries it ok but I am getting very worried about him.

Basically, it is because he eats crap. He very rarely comes home for dinner anymore and says my meals are boring. They aren't, I cook every day dinners which most of us eat, curries, roasts, stir-fries, salads, pasta dishes etc but the truth is he has been eating take out food for so long it has changed his taste for 'normal' foods, he is obviously craving high fat and sugar foods (yesterday's dinner was a Burger King). He has full use of the kitchen and can cook a meal himself as he can cook well but when he does he just comes home with a huge pizza.

But this weight gain is starting to have a detrimental effect on his health, he has angry red stretch marks all over his body and seems to have a cold almost every week recently. He regularly has acid indigestion. He also has joint hypermobility and has issues with knee subluxation which has been more frequent since this weight gain, the physio has told him it's being exacerbated by the extra weight.

He's not depressed btw, quite the opposite, this has all coincided with him landing his dream job and his first girlfriend a year ago and I think it's all because he is now so content. And before anyone asks, yes I very much like his girlfriend, we get on well with her, she's a lovely girl hut she doesn't eat healthy either.

I don't say much about it as I know that would be the worst thing, no teen boy is going to want a mum whinging on at him but how can I best support him? Nothing that I have gently suggested so far sinks in, he is obviously not ready to address this but as a mum I am so very worried as his weight just keeps going up and it is surely going to have an negative impact on his health eventually.

Oh, he hates any sport or exercise so it's no use suggesting taking up a sport as he won't be interested at all. Except swimming, he does like that but doesn't go too often.

I'm on my first week of Monjaro (weight loss injection) - it's not made me feel ill or nauseous at all just less hungry and full much more quickly.

You could consider gently asking your son if he is concerned about his weight gain. If he is and after looking into it you both feel weight loss injections are right for him you could encourage him to try them and help him pay for them if that's possible.

Injections aren't instead of a healthy diet or exercise, they are as well as, but they make the healthy calorie controlled diet much easier to stick to. Exercise is also important to maintain muscle mass during weight loss.

I have considered suggesting weight loss injections as I know a few people who have had such success with them. I did wonder if it could kick start a healthier lifestyle for him, hoping that once he saw the weight loss and hopefully felt much better it may prompt him to start exercising and eating much better?

Good luck with it all, hope it's a success for you.

Sounds like he doesn't understand about food and nutrition. He's recently stopped growing, so he can no longer eat like a horse without putting on weight.

Ultimately this is going to be his choice. HPFs are highly addictive, same goes for all the junk food he's eating.

Do you have a set of scales in your bathroom? If not, put some in there.

I would start inviting his girlfriend round regularly for dinner, then he will get back in the habit of eating with you too again.

He totally understands what's good for his body and what isn't but he simply doesn't seem to care. I think he's of the mindset that he's young and can get away with it.

I agree with you that upf are so very addictive. He's going to have to treat it like an addiction and somehow slowly wean himself off but ATM I believe he is firmly in denial.

We don't have any scales.

It's a bit complicated tbh. DS's gf is in recovery from an ED, she is uncomfortable eating in front of people. I understand and don't push anything.

Personally, I wouldn't mention it unless he mentions it to you and wants to discuss it. I'm sure he's quite aware of his weight and doesn't need someone pointing it out to him.

I appreciate you are concerned.

I haven't said anything directly to him for quite sometime but he's getting bigger, eating more crap and catching every cold going recently.

I am more than concerned for him but know there is little I can do until he makes the choice to correct this.

As others have said at 19 he's getting past that teenage boy stage where they can eat double and stay skinny.
I think if his own mother can't tell him the truth then no-one can.
If I stood by and said nothing while my child made a big mistake I would regret it. He can then choose to ignore but you will have tried.
I would plan a conversation along the lines of
You must be aware that you haven't just put on a bit of weight you have reached the level of being very overweight. This won't disappear on it's own and the older you get the harder it gets to change. It's really bad for your health now but it'll only get worse. Diabetes is a risk.
You don't have to give up all the foods you enjoy but you have to learn moderation and better eating habits.
Offer to help if he is receptive.