DH snoring - what else to try?

[Seaside31]

Please. I’m at the absolute end of my tether here 😔

DH has snored for as long as I’ve known him but it seems to be getting progressively worse over the years. We all had the flu at the beginning of December and since then it has been completely unbearable 😔 We live in a small bungalow so even if he sleeps in a different room he can be heard through the whole house. I’ve had to start putting white noise on in DCs room as they keep being woken by it. I can’t even begin to explain how loud it is.

He has seen the GP multiple times over the years as he’s concerned it could be sleep apnoea. GP is completely uninterested. Eventually sent a referral to ENT just to pacify DH but he’s been on the waiting list 21 months so far with no sign of an appointment.

Questioned the GP as to wether he could use a private ENT for consultation/diagnosis and then access NHS treatment as we definitely cannot afford full private but GP said he’d have to be assessed by NHS ENT to get treatment anyway so “it’s pointless doing that”.

He’s waking himself up with it constantly so is exhausted. And on a selfish note, I’m at the end of my tether 😔 I’ve had a horrendous year of up and down health myself including sleep issues and eventually been diagnosed recently with Hashimotos. I havent had a continuous period of sleep longer than an hour for over a year. I have previous trauma from being in a house that was burgled and I cannot wear any kind of earplugs/headphones - plus, I need to be able to hear preschool aged DC as DH can’t.

We’ve tried:

• every pillow/nasal strip/mouth guard etc on the market
• humidifiers and dehumidifier
• nasal steam before bed
• getting fresh air and exercise before bed
• not eating close to bed
• cutting caffeine
• every sleep position possible

Can anyone think of ANYTHING else we can try?!
He’s not overweight, is active, rarely has a drink (although snoring definitely IS worse when he does), non-smoker. It doesn’t seem to be just nose or throat - it sounds like both to me but I’m obviously not an expert.

Ignoring the GP and contacting a private consultant to ask how long the wait is?

White noise for you and he sleeps elsewhere?

He doesn’t need to be assessed by the nhs to go private.

get a private gp appointment and see a private consultant - one session could do it

What is his weight like? Anecdotally skinny people don't snore as much.

Agree- is he overweight? Does he drink alcohol in the evenings? Lie on his back/sides?

I know you say you've tried everything but you didn't mention mouth taping or those face things you get that keeps sometimes mouth completely closed.

Could you buy a cpap machine?

She said he's not overweight.

What's his breathing like when awake? Can he breath fully and deeply through his nose?

Dh had Nasal polyps that a nasal steroid spray was able to shink.

Sounds like he really needs an ENT if there's any way that appointment can be pushed.

Soundproofing for his room but that doesn't help him sleep.

My dear brothers in Christ, it's not a long OP and poor old @Seaside31 has been clear that he's not overweight, is active and only very rarely drinks. It's her that's sleep-deprived, not you lot!!!!

I had GP refer me privately for tests And initial consultation and then back into the NHS for treatment. Indeed it was what the GP recommended I did. It definitely sped things up.

It's worth following this up, it sounds impossible for all of you.

And there can be other things that sleep apnea that cause it so it is worth getting to the bottom of it. My snoring is bad when my Myasthenia flares (but we are lucky as we have a spare bedroom). Does he have any other symptoms etc that might be related and worth investigating?

Could you pop some soundproofing up, and one of you sleep in the living room? Or can you sleep in with your child for now?

I don’t know his actual weight or BMI etc but he comfortably fits in a gents Medium so I would say his weight is fine. And as I say, he’s active and does regular exercise.

Drinks alcohol once in a blue moon on special occasions. Drinks water and decaf tea most of the time. Has a morning coffee maybe 3x per week at most.

@Hello39 Breathing when awake seems fine - although he’s mid 30s and claims to be physically unable to blow his nose which I’ve always found strange and wondered if they’re connected. GP just laughed at this though.

I have sleep apnea (obstructive) because I am fat.
There are different types of apena and yes skinny people can get it shock horror
he needs a referral to the sleep clinic.

@LambriniBobInIsleworthISeesYa 😂😂🫠 Thank you! I didn’t try to include as much detail as I could but I think I went too wordy 😂

@CaptainBeanThief Any tips at all on how to push for this. GP not interested - 21 months on ENT waiting list so far and he’s chasing it maybe every 8 weeks or so incase of last min cancellations etc.

Did anything else make you think it was sleep apnoea? It’s most common in the overweight but you can have it and be thin. Any morning headaches? Sleepy in the day? Unrefreshing sleep? Have you seen him choking/stopping breathing? Any of these then back to GP and ask again about referral for sleep study. Or you could do this privately.

DH saw ENT privately and he had some nasal inflammation and suffers with bay fever, they recommended he use Dymista spray which is quite pricey but GP was happy to prescribe.
I can’t say it’s made much difference to him but his sleep study shows he has severe sleep apnoea so that’s the bigger culprit in our house.

Oh OP I feel for you - I had similar with my DP. Earplugs etc didn’t touch it.

I was losing my mind at one point through lack of sleep - I actually got a decibel meter thingy and recorded it whilst measuring exactly how loud it was. Same as you - DP could be heard on the other side of the house and down the hallway in hotels. It was horrendous. I used to bury DP in pillows then go sleep in another room.

1. Sod it, go and get a private assessment. If you can record it then do so - having the recording was really helpful when DP finally went to the docs as although it occasionally appeared like sleep apnoea, it didn’t fit the whole bill.
2. Sleeping position - back is absolutely the worst.
3. The doc eventually thought DP needed a sinus op to sort it out but, before got to the camera up the nose point, it turned out that it improved massively after they had a double root canal and back tooth/old filling extracted. They had the filling done years before and it had been bodged. We think it must have had some continuous low level infection or inflammation which wasn’t helping matters.

DP still has bad nights but I generally don’t end up wanting to smother them now.

Your comment about him being unable to blow his nose is a bit of a smoking gun though!

The GP doesn't sound great. Is there a 2nd doctor /2nd opinion you can get. Obstruction that makes him feel like his can't blow his nose is a red flag to me.

Apparently dentists can check for issues too, maybe you have a dentist who is better than your GP.

There also may be sleep clinics who check for all that. Physical/anatomy issues, sleep apnea etc.

No, he's not overweight, he rarely drinks (although snoring is worse when he does) and he has tried every possible sleep position.

How do I know all this? Because I read the bloody OP!!!

Make an appointment with the GP.
Tell them under no circumstances are you leaving until you get a referral to the sleep clinic. It's gone on far too long and it's ruining yours and his quality of life,
You have to advocate for what you really need or you won't get,
If they refuse still, tell them you will be arranging an appointment to speak with the practice manager.
My snoring affects my husband and I sometimes wake myself up with my own snoring if I'm not using my CPAP machine - so you have my sympathy

Recording the snoring and decibels is a good idea. It's not a normal level of snoring.

That's not what the OP asked. She said can he be assessed privately and then have NHS treatment, as private treatment is not affordable for them.

Jeez, the level of reading comprehension on this thread is abysmal.

@GeorgeBeckett Yeah, he’s always saying “I don’t know why I’m so tired when you’re the one that was up with DC”! He can also fall asleep anywhere within minutes. Not morning headaches as such, but always saying he feels “fuzzy headed” in the mornings.

I haven’t seen him physically choke or stop breathing but he’ll start with a quiet ish snore, then it’ll get gradually louder for maybe 10ish snores before he wakes himself up. So he’s waking up constantly.

GP has heard all of this multiple times. I’m just looking into private sleep studies. We really can’t afford it but we can’t go on like this either so will need to find a way to make it work!

@TiredCatLady Going to try and get a private assessment organised - you’re right, it definitely needs done.

Sleeping on his back or his front is his most comfy position naturally but he makes a conscious effort to sleep on his side to try and improve it as best he can.

GP doesn’t think the nose blowing is an issue at all.

@Hello39 I have worded it as if it’s just one GP actually but it’s been multiple at our local GP practice - we very rarely get the same one twice. Going to try and find a sleep clinic this week 🤞🏼

You can't just buy one. You need a prescription from a doctor.

OP I would definitely ask for a referral to the sleep clinic. My DH had the exact same issues, super loud snoring, tired during the day. I could also tell that he was sort of micro waking up multiple times in the night, though he wasn't aware of it himself.

GP immediately referred him to sleep clinic. He had a sleep test done at home (wearing some kind of monitor), and was then issued with a CPAP machine, which has been life changing.

If GP refuses, question it. Ask for an explanation as to why they don't think his symptoms are suggestive of sleep apnea. It has long term detrimental health impacts way beyond just tiredness and your husband/you need to be pushy if the GP isn't listening.