Please help me decide what to do. Thanks for reading.
I have two jobs. My main job is part time, 3dpw. It's a lovely low-stress job, relatively good pay, but a long commute. It's my main income. I also have a specialist freelance/contractor job that I enjoy that pays a few thousand a year.
(Unfortunately I have no childcare to do my freelance work so I have to do it during baby's naps or pay for ad hoc nursery days etc, it's a bit stressful.)
Dh earns a bit over double what I earn altogether.
Unfortunately with childcare costs, mortgage etc, we are currently spending slightly more than our income each month (eating into savings) which is understandably stressing dh out a bit as he's the main earner.
Now, my main job has just told me they are short staffed in my particular specialism and would I like to increase my hours? They say no pressure if I'd rather not.
Unfortunately ds's nursery doesn't do half days. Separately, because of my long commute, 4yo dd has to go into after school care on my working days, which she hates (and isn't cheap).
So, option 1: I could ask to pick up another morning a week (up to 3.5dpw) Ds would go into nursery an additional day, but I could pick him up at 4ish and dd wouldn't need after school care that day so no impact on her. Big plus: I'd have a free afternoon each week to do my freelance work (yes! way less stress for me). But huge minus: after tax and nursery fees, we'd actually be a couple of hundred quid per month worse off this way. However, I could quite probably pick up more freelance work to offset this and perhaps we'd break even.
Option 2: I'd ask for an extra day a week. In this plan, ds would have another long nursery day and dd would have to go in after school care (more stress for both of them). Dh would have to do all the pickups and drop offs for the four days a week, which means he has to catch up on work after bedtime even more than he usually does (more stress for him). We'd be maybe £3-400pcm better off, after tax and childcare fees. But I'd still have no proper time for my freelance work and even less time to cram it in. More stress for me too.
Option 3... no change to current schedule. Maybe cut back on spending, although we aren't particularly spendy. We go to pizza express or get a takeaway for dinner once a week, and take the kids to the softplay once a week, that's about it. Dh and I never have any dates, unless you count having a glass of wine while watching TV/the baby monitor. So our lives would be slightly joyless especially in winter if we had to cut these back. But we could.
Option 4... something else...?