Utilising carers leave one day a week indefinitely

[theyoungishman]

My dad has been diagnosed with dementia, and my mum takes care of him at home. There are only the three of us in our family so this is solely on her.
I've been at my workplace for over 20 years and used very few sick or carer days, so I probably have around four months of carers leave to use if I need to.
I'm thinking of requesting to HR to utilise one day per week of carers leave in order to give my mum a break and look after my dad. Would this sound reasonable to you?

Sounds tough for you all.

Do you accrue carers leave in this way though? It’s not like holiday time, in my understanding. You can ask your employer but it may be that they suggest you drop down to a 4-day week instead.

Thank you. I'm in a country where personal and carers leave are all lumped together and you can use it for either yourself if you're sick or looking after a family member who is unwell. It rolls over each year hence why I have so much to use

Does the entitlement to leave build up year after year? In my workplace it's an annual allowance and resets. It's also aimed at acute situations. Options I could suggest would be reducing to key time hours or taking unpaid leave.

I would suggest staying in employment and paying for a cleaner or someone to go in and cook for them. This situation is not going to improve and you would find yourself being there more and more.

It's very reasonable to ask.
Does your company offer flexible working as you may need a long-term solution as your ddad has dementia.
I've condensed my hours, I now work 4 longer days and have a day off every week.
I'm supposed to work 7 hrs a day but now work 8.75 over 4 days.
When my DM had cancer they also let me wfh full-time (until she passed away) it's usually hybrid working.
I work for Network Rail, a big company who actually do care about their employees.
Definitely ask but I'd be asking what they could offer you, how flexible they could be ❤️

I'm guessing you aren't in the U.K. so you need to check the exact rules for your jurisdiction. It doesn't work like that here as it doesn't accumulate, I have the same max sick leave (3 months) as on day 1 and carers leave is to sort out an acute/emergency situation rather than managing long term care situations, flexible working would be the way to permanently change my schedule

I don't think you are going to get sensible answers, as the majority of replies are going to be UK centric, and leave doesn't usually carry over like that here.

You need to ask your manager how it could be organized - and if they say no, use some of the other suggestions from this thread as alternatives if they might be acceptable in your region.

Are there respite services where you live? It may be better for him to go to a good day centre run by a care facility where he can do activities and be stimulated. It is also a good way of acclimatising him to a care centre, as he may need that kind of facility further into his illness. If he has been attending for day care, he may find it less frightening as it will be familiar to him.