Rugby - should I worry about DS playing?

[Cornwallian]

My 12 year old DS is very sporty. For a while he was in a football academy but that didn’t work out and since they dropped him in the autumn he’s really concentrated on rugby as I think his football confidence has been knocked. He’s very good at rugby and has been offered a place on a very good team that takes development very seriously. DS is now day dreaming about becoming a professional rugby player.

You read so much about brain damage and rugby nowadays and I’m nervous about him moving to a more serious team with more serious matches and following a path of regular pay which over the years may mean accumulated brain trauma which he could end up suffering from when older.

Do others worry about their sons playing rugby? Or if your son loved it, was good at it and was part of a really nice team would you be happy?

OP my DS started rugby at about the same age. I was (and still am) nervous about it. I have been impressed by how much the coaches talk about concussion and how quickly they act when anyone has even the hint of an injury. Also, my son loves it and has made a lot of friends through rugby.

Having said that, it is still a sport with risks and at times can be very hard to watch! Good luck :-)

I would as it is a risk
but also life is for living
Same as horse riding
somethings are worth the risk

I'm a massive rugby fan but I do understand your concerns. My DS played until he was about 14 (when all his peers suddenly grew a lot bigger than him and he realised he was likely to get hurt).

I was the safeguarding lead at a kid's rugby club for many years, and also did concussion training and a first aid course. I can definitely say that safety is a very high priority at all times, and any suspicion of concussion is taken seriously and players aren't allowed to play for a few weeks afterwards to ensure they've completely recovered.

Accidents do happen though, but most aren't serious. In 6 years we had 1 broken collar bone (and that was tag rugby, so not even contact - the child just happened to land awkwardly), several nose bleeds, a sprained ankle and one suspected concussion.

The RFU are constantly updating safety standards and there are lots of newish rules in place to minimise injuries (eg. Rules about collapsing scrums to prevent neck injuries etc).

On balance I think the benefit of the strong team experience outweighed the risk of injury for my DS, and he has very fond memories of his team and the bond they had.

Rugby has really tightened up on safety in recent years. This reflects growing awareness/concern about the impact of repeated head trauma, particularly on young people…and concern that individual schools and clubs could face legal action in the future.

But there are still risks associated with contact rugby. And IME some “serious clubs” can be inconsistent with their concussion protocols, particularly so once the player is over 18 and can take decisions for themselves. I have seen young men playing on many occasions when they shoukd not have done.

I think a lot depends on what position your DS plays, how often he plays contact games and whether the coaches really prioritise safety over winning. A winger is less at risk than a scrum half. A child who plays one contact game a week, three months a year is less at risk than one who is playing school rugby every Saturday for two terms, club rugby every Sunday for two terms and training over the holidays and summer because he is in or aspiring to join an academy team. But if your DS is a talented player looking at a professional pathway, I am assuming he is in the higher risk group.

I do think that rugby builds determination, resilience, drive and team working skills though - and more so than other potentially dangerous sports. But there is a balance to be struck.

DD plays. I worry... but then I worry about Scout camps, school trips, water sports... there's risks in everything.

The one thing that reassures me about rugby is how seriously they take safety. Everything is so strict.

Shes on her third season... and only injury she's had was taking an extremely well passed ball to the face from an U16 when she's an U12 who misjudged her height during a touch game!

My DS’s school sent him back on when he’d been knocked out and had a facial injury. I’d avoid it if you can.

It's a risk but so is horse riding, gymnastics and cheerleading.

DD has played for 4 years and never had more than bruises.

Training, playing and concussions are taken far more seriously now than they were 10 years ago. You can't compare a teen playing today with additional safety and safeguarding with blokes in their 40s and 50s who didn't have that and ended up with head issues.

My son had a great few years playing rugby but of course it made me nervous. He played from the age of about 9 and is now 16 and about to go to South Africa to play in a schools tournament - apparently the play over there is ferocious. Yes, it’s a worry but he has gained so, so much from rugby: drive, self-confidence, pride, camaraderie… the list goes on. I have ended up taking a phlegmatic approach: life is full of small risks but you have to look at the benefits too. I believe that playing rugby has kept my son away from other risks like drinking too much and drugs (as he is so into fitness and often has to be up early on a weekend to play in a match). The only thing I would say is, be careful about what kind of rugby club he joins. Some are genuinely thoughtful and caring of their players and ensure all the players are properly looked after, mentally and physically. Other clubs get caught up trying to win matches/tournaments and will take risks with their players (like sending them on the pitch when they are injured, not taking concussion seriously). Choose a nice club and let him have fun. Good luck!

There are quite strict rules on how many hours of contact per week they can play at different ages (I presume to try to mitigate the risks of accumulated brain trauma) and the coaches are very hot on concussion protocols etc.
My son plays and I do worry but I also worry about my daughter who plays no sport and spends most of her time on her phone

My boys played for years and I worried and feel we had a lucky escapee with no concussions. I never missed a game just in case someone needed to make a call. I am not normally a worrier but I hated the rugby.

We insisted in hats (I am aware the evidence is dubious, and one boy was a prop so it was good practice) and repeated that their rugby career was over after one concussion. One concussion is a bad. Multiple concussions are devestating.

I saw many parents allow and coaches allow concussed kids back on the field after a week or two and get concussed again. It can be accidental, but some kids seem to put themselves in vulnerable situations more than others.

It’s a relief to have it over. I don’t miss it at all.

School is totally different to club rugby. My DS is now 17 and has been playing for 10 years. He’s in an academy and a very talented player. He’s a back so doesn’t seem to be pick up as many injuries but they take head injuries incredibly seriously and his friends who have had concussion have to take 3 weeks enforced rest. School are not so good - that’s the one to avoid if you’re worried!

DS played rugby and soccer at school and had far more injuries playing soccer. He only gave up when he went to university and decided to try out for the team and saw that all the other players were much bigger than him.