What is the security in being married?

[Gracelet]

I always read about it on here, people saying that they want the security of marriage - but what is that?

All of the above is true and valid of course, but what is true in the best case scenario is also true in the worst case scenario. The contract of marriage is a double edged sword. Caveat emptor.

IMO it depends on the person - if they're skint and have a gambling habit or debt marriage is a liability.

Frankly, if you're married and have kids you have a greater chance of getting more money out your DH in the event you divorce. You might get a greater share of assets, pension attachment etc. As well as child maintenance - if you're not married you will never get more than the CMS mandated amount.

If you're sacrificing your career and earnings whilst raising children and your DH is financially solvent being married is a good idea. I'll be honest that's why I got married. DH knows that too - it's a legal arrangement.

My husband became very unwell at the age of 34. Because we were married I was his next of kin this meant that the doctors at the hospital consulted with me about his care and ultimately how to manage his death, not his parents. Later there was a difference of opinion on some aspects of the funeral and the funeral director gently reminded the wider family that I was the next of kin, and my wishes had priority.
I did not have to pay any inheritance tax. I was entitled to a pension from my husbands employers for life. I was also entitled to a widows pension from DWP, until I remarried.
I find it reassuring to know that the person acting for me as my next of kin, should the need ever arise, is my lovely second husband.

You're not next of kin if you're not married. The lady I know who it happened to had to get his mum to fill out forms for the bank, funeral paperwork etc. because she couldn't do it.

Being married automatically negates previous will too, so if he previously had a will leaving his house to a child from a previous marriage, it would no longer apply. If you're not married, the current partner has to move out and give up the house to its new owner.

You don't automatically get a spouses pension or death in service benefits. Nor do you get to make any medical decisions about anyone because you are married to them.

Basically being married gives you a right to claim your spouses property on divorce. And they have the same rights to your property. So it works if you're the lower earner or one with the least assets.

There's actually no such concept in English law as next of kin. No one has any right to make decisions about another's health without a poa or court order. Things like arranging funerals are up to main beneficiary of estate (if there is a dispute- which is rare). These are not anything to do with marriage.

Marriage is a legal contract. The same is also true of civil partnership. You cannot replicate the provisions of marriage/CP outside of the institution. In particular, the state will treat a married/CP couple's relationship differently to that of cohabitants when it ends through either death or separation.

Because the median woman is better protected by this than unmarried cohabitation, people think of it is as protection. There are also lots of things where marriage is a bit of a shortcut, like if the intestacy provisions kick in because you haven't got a will and you want to leave assets to a partner, it's easier when you're married. Obviously, everyone should make sure they have wills, their pension and insurance are up to date etc. Everyone doesn't.

Marriage and CP are very similar levels of protection when inside the UK, but CP isn't recognised in as many places abroad whereas marriage has global recognition.

Some people don't experience this as protection. If you want more control over what you do with your assets, for example, you're often better off not having a contract where the state assumes certain things about your relationships.